Depression

When you have depression its like it snows every day. Some days its only a couple of inches. Its a pain in the ass, but you still make it to work, the grocery store. Sure, maybe you skip the gym or your friends birthday party, but it is still snowing and who knows how bad it might get tonight. Probably better to just head home. Your friend notices, but probably just thinks you are flaky now, or kind of an asshole. Some days it snows a foot. You spend an hour shoveling out your driveway and are late to work. Your back and hands hurt from shoveling. You leave early because its really coming down out there. Your boss notices. Some days it snows four feet. You shovel all morning but your street never gets plowed. You are not making it to work, or anywhere else for that matter. You are so sore and tired you just get back in the bed. By the time you wake up, all your shoveling has filled back in with snow. Looks like your phone rang; people are wondering where you are. You dont feel like calling them back, too tired from all the shoveling. Plus they dont get this much snow at their house so they dont understand why youre still stuck at home. They just think youre lazy or weak, although they rarely come out and say it. Some weeks its a full-blown blizzard. When you open your door, its to a wall of snow. The power flickers, then goes out. Its too cold to sit in the living room anymore, so you get back into bed with all your clothes on. The stove and microwave wont work so you eat a cold Pop Tart and call that dinner. You havent taken a shower in three days, but how could you at this point? Youre too cold to do anything except sleep. Sometimes people get snowed in for the winter. The cold seeps in. No communication in or out. The food runs out. What can you even do, tunnel out of a forty foot snow bank with your hands? How far away is help? Can you even get there in a blizzard? If you do, can they even help you at this point? Maybe its death to stay here, but its death to go out there too. The thing is, when it snows all the time, you get worn all the way down. You get tired of being cold. You get tired of hurting all the time from shoveling, but if you dont shovel on the light days, it builds up to something unmanageable on the heavy days. You resent the hell out of the snow, but it doesnt care, its just a blind chemistry, an act of nature. It carries on regardless, unconcerned and unaware if it buries you or the whole world. Also, the snow builds up in other areas, places you cant shovel, sometimes places you cant even see. Maybe its on the roof. Maybe its on the mountain behind the house. Sometimes, theres an avalanche that blows the house right off its foundation and takes you with it. A veritable Act of God, nothing can be done. The neighbors say its a shame and they cant understand it; he was doing so well with his shoveling. The end...