Why Nudism?

Having been a nudist for 20-ish years and met a lot of nudists (online and in-person), you'd get the impression that nudists magically wake up with no physical insecurities about their nudity, hang-ups about people seeing their body, or somehow magically become impervious to the embarrassment or shame of being seen nude. For me none of that is true about why nudism fits for me so well. It's not that I don't have insecurities or embarrassment about being seen nude, it's that nudism is my way of not hiding behind my insecurities or running away from the things that would make me feel ashamed of my naked body. The fact that these things are still with me makes nudism stronger, more meaningful and powerful to me. It started in my early years of the Army and some unfriendly locker room teasing, things that were considered normal back then but would probably be considered sexual harassment now. Like I said in my profile, I was very skinny, scrawny (graduated high school weighing about 120 pounds) and nerdy (what I didn't know back then was that I'm on the autism spectrum, so that didn't help). Easy target for the ex-high school sports jocks and other wanna-be tough guys looking for somebody to step on to make themselves look badass. I got jumped 3 separate times my first year. Of course among bullies, snickering about my small manhood wasn't off-limits. It only happened a few times, but enough to make a permanent impression. I spent about most of my first year showering nude (open shower setup) in front of people who routinely went out of my way to mistreat me, occasionally tried to beat me up, and studied the details of my nude body probably feeling empowered in their masculine superiority. It was a very humbling and formative time for me. I eventually ended up doing a tour in Germany, which was incredible because I got to work on the German I learned in high school, becoming fluent. Eventually, through getting to know locals and get deeper into the culture, I was convinced to try out nude sunbathing in an FKK area and later their saunas. Explosion. It was such a surreal experience those first few times, seeing so many people of all shapes and sizes as carefree with their nudity as though they were wearing their church clothes. I decided I wanted that freedom for my life for me, forever. And I've been much happier with myself ever since. So, for me, it's not that I have no embarrassment or physical insecurities about being seen nude, in fact, the bigger I get from weight training, the more "disproportionate" I feel like I look, especially as a muscular, black male. However, the fact that I feel those insecurities and still choose to go nude is what is so damn empowering about nudism. Every time I don't hide from my nudity around people, I feel like I've accomplished something worthwhile.