When I was at my last non-landed club event, I noticed the usual preponderance of men, and the fact that most of us were "senior citizens" (at least defined by Denny's restaurants... 55 or older). And I noticed that almost none of us had bodies that would inspire lustful thoughts in your average person.
Two thoughts struck me. The first is that we are seeing bodies as they actually are, not the kind that seem to be prevalent in porn. We are overweight, we have small penises and sagging breasts. But we're comfortable with that.
But we know what naked bodies should look like. Young people who haven't been exposed to nudism don't, and their only reference to naked people is what they see in porn: idealized female bodies with perky breasts, and slim waistlines, and male bodies with gym-rat physiques and big cocks. When they compare themselves to that image, they have to draw the conclusion that their bodies are substandard, and they're reluctant to show those bodies to other people because they fear that they'll be humiliated.
I doubt that there are many people above the age of puberty who hasn't been exposed to porn over the internet. So they see these images and draw the wrong conclusion. They've never gotten the message that there is nudity that isn't involved with sex, since they don't see it in the media or in their own lives.
My second thought was that women, as usual, get the short end of the stick. They begin to struggle with body images from middle school on, and are more reluctant to expose their bodies to other people. Add to that the fact that they're being hit on for the first time in their lives, and find men staring at them even when they're clothed, and you have an explanation for the fact that you don't see them as often in situations where they are naked, unless they're in the company of a partner (preferably of the opposite sex).
Maybe the reason that men aren't as reluctant is the fact that there are more men who are not physically attractive who nonetheless get starring roles in television series and films. So guys have some role models to tell them that as long as they're not grossly overweight or under-muscled, their bodies might not be that repulsive.
And, of course, if we grew up just after World War II, most of us have been in some sort of communal nude situation in gym showers or, less often, in nude swimming events. So we had a chance to compare our bodies to those of others of our sex, and seen the normal variations. Do kids today have that opportunity, or are the ideal bodies of porn stars and models the only nude people they ever see today?
Replies
- SA
Stone AndyNov 7, 2021As a parent one can assume that kids find access to porn earlier than we'd like to think. So the onus is on us as parents to expose our children to a healthier, balanced and more realistic view of nudity, particularly in a setting not defined by sexuality. Nudism should be a wonderful opportunity for kids to understand that adults have real bodies like their parents and that they can be comfortable with their bodies as they develop and mature.
When resorts discriminate against single parents, their children - a good 50% of children today - don't have the opportunity to get exposed to a healthy view of adult nudity. Who will be around to frequent the resorts in 20 years? Porn 1 - Nudism 0.ReactReply - ST
SteveNov 8, 2021Certainly porn creates a problematic set of expectations around sex. But I rather think body image issues arise even without porn, given entertainment, advertising, and the incessant showing-off on social media by "influencers" and peers.
ReactReply - JOJohnOriginal PosterNov 9, 2021nudeyooper wrote: [quote]I don't think that body issues are related to porn as much as fashion or lack of. Fashion gives us an almost full view of the feminine body when you consider swimwear, yoga pants, and sports bras. How many of the girls that wear clothes that can appear to be painted on have body issues? Those that do will wear what is fashionable even if they are not comfortable with the look and they would never get the connection that what they are wearing is not much different from being nude.[/quote] There's that component, too. And again, fashion shows us unrealistic images, and lets us show approval of young, perfectly proportioned women. If an overweight senior citizen showed up at Walmart in those same yoga pants and sports bra, she would not be greeted with the same approval. But this may be as close as a young person gets to seeing what people are really shaped like. I think that my original point holds true. As long as the only body forms that young people see, either naked or in form-revealing clothes, are idealized bodies, then the more inferior those young people will see themselves as, and the more reluctant they will be to show their own natural forms to their peers. The problem with body-shaming and the threat it poses to nudism isn't that we body-shame others. It's that we body-shame ourselves.ReactReply
- MA
MarcusNov 10, 2021Great discussion. I also think because young people are watching porn since they are 8 they are conditioned that nudism is porn. They body shame and eroticise themselves and the consequence is less and less younger people are visiting nudist places.
ReactReply - JOJohnOriginal PosterNov 10, 2021
And that impression can be checked by googling "Nudist" on any browser with "safe mode" turned up. For every sincere web site, there are a dozen porn sites. No wonder young people equate the two.
ReactReply - MEMemberNov 10, 2021
Comparison is the theft of Joy. If you are comparing your body to that of porn stars you are going to be dissatisfied with yourself for sure. If you think everyone is shredded with a 10 inch penis because the only naked bodies you have seen are in porn, a trip to the closest nudist resort will cure that image.
ReactReply - SAStone AndyNov 10, 2021[quote]Comparison is the theft of Joy. [/quote] Well said. And why are comparisons always against porn stars, models and other celebrities or the fattest ugliest Walmartians in the world? Why do we see our health as being as sick as our neighbors? Why can't we compare our selves with our best and worst selves and find a happy medium? Nudism is a great teacher for living in the joy of this body at this time in this place. Now if only nudist resorts were as non-discriminatory about gender as they are about pants, they'd be worth a visit!ReactReply
- NUnudeyooperNov 11, 2021
I believe that comparison is part of being human. We compare in so many areas of life that I could not mention all of them. Whether it be possessions, thoughts, ideals, or beliefs, we compare ours to those we have some kind of contacts with. So if it is natural to compare my car to your car or even the car we did not buy, or the thought that my brand is better, the ideal that the fuel I use is more environmental friendly, or the belief that my model is better, it just comes naturally to us that my body is in better or worse shape than anothers. My body is in worse shape than many celebrities my age and for that I do not care. My body is also in worse shape than it was fifty years ago and I struggle to keep it from getting worse. I am not winning. We compare hundreds of times each day, but we obsess over just a few.
ReactReply - STSteveNov 11, 2021
Our culture tells us what to compare. I used to live in San Francisco, but occasionally drive to Los Angeles to work. One trip was to a meeting with a dozen or two colleagues down there. When the meeting adjourned, they - all men - walked into the parking lot and began looking at, and commenting on, one anothers' cars. That simply would never have happened in San Francisco. To me, it was weird bordering on rude; I simply didn't point out that my car was the cheapest-available Chevy we were standing next to, and lingered until most of them had driven away. We may take note of cars, or of bodies, but our culture tells us what's important to compare.
ReactReply - JOJohnOriginal PosterNov 11, 2021NudeRunner817 wrote: [quote] Comparison is the theft of Joy. If you are comparing your body to that of porn stars you are going to be dissatisfied with yourself for sure. If you think everyone is shredded with a 10 inch penis because the only naked bodies you have seen are in porn, a trip to the closest nudist resort will cure that image.[/quote] My point exactly. But maybe that guy with the normal penis and physique won't ever go to a nudist resort or nude beach in the first place, because porn has made him ashamed to show his body. And, come to think of it, that goes for women, too. A woman with belly fat or sagging breasts has been struggling to conceal those features with shapewear and bras all her life. To dispense with those and show herself as she is may be hard enough even in the clothed world; it might be unthinkable for her to be seen naked at a nude event. But porn may not be as much of an influence.ReactReply
- SAStone AndyNov 11, 2021[quote]....maybe that guy with the normal penis and physique won't ever go to a nudist resort or nude beach in the first place, because porn has made him ashamed to show his body. And, come to think of it, that goes for women, too. [/quote] Religions at their good core say love people and use things. Media and the consumerism which drives it essentially tell us to use people and to love things. That makes comparison challenging. I like to compare what is important to me and under my control. The size of breasts or penises along with other "beauty" ideals are basically set at birth and say very little about a person. On the other hand, we all have a lot more influence on our health and fitness than most of us own. It seems like the fatter we Americans get, the more we obsess over things like SUVs, smartphones, nails and hair. In other words, I won't compare my average penis with a porn star's, nor will I try to photoshop my reality like the media is somehow able to, getting back molars to shine like florescent lights. Instead I choose self-compassion. However, I don't apply body acceptance to justify making poor decisions that limit my health and lifestyle options as I age. Media sells freedom, but responsibility defines the foundation of how we are free and what our limits are.ReactReply
- MEMemberJan 18, 2022
When CULTure dictates what goes on in the privacy & sanctity of one's mind; its not a culture of HEALTH but DIS.ease.
ReactReply - EA
EarlDJan 23, 2022[quote]As a parent one can assume that kids find access to porn earlier than we'd like to think. So the onus is on us as parents to expose our children to a healthier, balanced and more realistic view of nudity, particularly in a setting not defined by sexuality. Nudism should be a wonderful opportunity for kids to understand that adults have real bodies like their parents and that they can be comfortable with their bodies as they develop and mature. When resorts discriminate against single parents, their children - a good 50% of children today - don't have the opportunity to get exposed to a healthy view of adult nudity. Who will be around to frequent the resorts in 20 years? Porn 1 - Nudism 0.[/quote] This is a really important point. Thank you for sharing. Some resort folks really need to rethink their business model and update for todays realityReactReply - EAEarlDJan 23, 2022[quote]And that impression can be checked by googling "Nudist" on any browser with "safe mode" turned up. For every sincere web site, there are a dozen porn sites. No wonder young people equate the two.[/quote] So true and when the word nudist is defined as just being naked then it is easier for the porn industry to co-opt it which it has done quite effectively making the association between nudism and sexual acts quite prevalent.ReactReply
- JOJohnOriginal PosterJan 23, 2022homeclothesfree wrote: [quote] So true and when the word nudist is defined as just being naked then it is easier for the porn industry to co-opt it which it has done quite effectively making the association between nudism and sexual acts quite prevalent.[/quote] From what I hear, that's exactly what happened in Germany. The FKK term (for Free Body Culture) has been hijacked by the porn industry, which means that the naturist movement now goes under another name.ReactReply
- EAEarlDJan 23, 2022[quote]From what I hear, that's exactly what happened in Germany. The FKK term (for Free Body Culture) has been hijacked by the porn industry, which means that the naturist movement now goes under another name.[/quote] Europeans were always more inclined to use the word naturist anyway. Though some organizations still hold on to FKK as a descriptor.ReactReply