Well, Im sure the dirtbags responsible probably wont find their way into the forum but I thought I would post this anyway. A very sweet lady I met here has been run off because of rude, crude sexual comments in the chatroom. On the off chance that one of the offenders reads this, I hope your "special" parts rott off. To be the spineless, gutless, kind of crap who hides behind a computer screen and talks like a dog to the ladies here, well that must be a very sad and pathetic life you live. Most of the people I have met here on TN are the most straight forward, kind people I have ever met on a web site. I hate it that a few rotten eggs ran a very nice lady off. What a shame that a nudist has to go to a non nudist chat room to have a decent conversation. Anyway, she did say that most of the people she met here were extremely nice and was very impressed with the topics and conversation in the forum. But her main draw is the chat and since it was impossible for her to enjoy it she decided to go elsewhere. Im starting to wonder if eliminating the chat wouldnt be the right move. It sure isnt helping to promote a healthy light for nudists.
Replies
- LI
limestone26Feb 4, 2010That sucks, BlueIron!
ReactReply - BLblueiron35Original PosterFeb 4, 2010
We lost Karen. She had been here for a while and had been certified since middle of last year. She is a very nice lady from Missourri.
ReactReply - JA
JackNeilsonFeb 4, 2010I agree. Although I don't use the chatroom and thus don't know from personal experience I have read a number of posts which appear to lead me to believe that it is often used as a place to harass or insult our ladies. There are few enough ladies here that the loss of even one to such actions diminishes True Nudists as a balanced and responsible forum. Solutions anyone?
ReactReply - JA
jasonFeb 4, 2010this is sson going to be a guys only site as all the women will have left due to guys who aren't really nudists using the site to pick up ladies. there has been a number of complaints from the ladies or someone speaking up on their behalf, does it have to be guys only before something is done?
ReactReply - JAJackNeilsonFeb 4, 2010
How about a sharp dagger and a twist a bit lower down? I will provide it if you want. Having finally found a site I enjoy these detestable scumbags really P me off. Those of you who use the chatroom have my sympathies.
ReactReply - CA
catbirdFeb 4, 2010The situation sucks.
More often than not, the chat room is a men's gathering. Maybe there is one or two women in the chat room. I can think of several ladies who used to be regulars in the chat room.
In addition, there are those who aim their cam to not show their face, but focus on lower down.ReactReply - BLblueiron35Original PosterFeb 4, 2010
RabbitnBunny, her screen name was nich_karen. She was a christian lady, 49, with a son and husband who were not into nudism. She loved the site but hated the chatroom. She almost left before Christmas and I convinced her to stay, but she said it got to be too much. I talk to her on yahoo now. She didnt do the forum much, she was new to nudism and wasnt ready for her pic to be on the forum yet. She got a lot of comments about her size and just didnt want to deal with it any more.
ReactReply - BLblueiron35Original PosterFeb 4, 2010
Im trying right now. But some of the comments may have shyed her away from the nudist lifestyle.
ReactReply - TH
ThomasFeb 4, 2010[quote]This is an unfortunate situation. Unless we all continually flag the offenders, nothing can be done. It would be great if they had moderators who were active in the chatroom. That way they could deal with inappropriate behaviour instantly and make it a more pleasant experience for everyone. I rarely go in there and only hang around if I know someone there otherwise it's not much fun.[/quote] There are many who do flag people when they behave inappropriately, just need more to do so. Some will say something to a person who has their cam aimed too low so if they don't adjust it many will flag them. I haven't been in chat as much lately so I never met Karen. I wish I had, then maybe I could have helped get the scum banned instead of her leaving. ThomasReactReply - MEMemberFeb 5, 2010
Sorry to hear about Karen, Blue. Never had the chance to meet her. I've only been in chat a few times lately and for the most part it's been tame. Unfortunately, the idiots are in just about every chat room. Nude or textile. Many,many years ago I used to occasionally chat in the yahoo chat rooms. This was before cams. And there was always some idiot driving people (mainly women) away with their rude remarks and sleazy private messages.
I can not emphasize enough the importance to the regulars of flagging and reporting to abuse those who insist upon violating the rules of the chat room. And in openly standing up for those who are being abused.
The chat room is not for everyone. And is only one of the many features here on this site. Please let Karen know that the garbage she experienced in the chat room is not indicitive of social nudity. I really like Paw's suggestion of encouraging your friend to participate in an active group instead.
JenReactReply - CAcatbirdFeb 5, 2010
Perhaps a few men have been driven away. I think of Green Lantern who used to be a regular in the chat room. He was a real gentleman who would respond to those who harass women. His response was on the order of "knock it off." He was on my friends list. It has been months since I have heard from him. This morning, out of curiousity, I checked to see whether he is still around, and I found out he is gone.
ReactReply - THThomasFeb 6, 2010[quote]Perhaps a few men have been driven away. I think of Green Lantern who used to be a regular in the chat room. He was a real gentleman who would respond to those who harass women. His response was on the order of "knock it off." He was on my friends list. It has been months since I have heard from him. This morning, out of curiousity, I checked to see whether he is still around, and I found out he is gone.[/quote] Green left but has returned with a new name. I will tell him you were asking about him. ThomasReactReply
- MEMemberFeb 7, 2010[quote]Meanwhile we gained another lovely lady, Exquisite. Make her welcome folks![/quote] Although I've already welcomed her to the site, Freedom, my welcome will be much warmer when she stops using pictures of a professional model that were copied from another website...ReactReply
- CO
Curt, or CowboyFeb 7, 2010I'd made comment about a lady.
It was recommended I refer her to this very website.
I did not, saying ( at the time ) "all in good time."
These days, I'd probably decide on another site. In fact, there is another lady now whom I will not recommend this site as it is.
That being said, there are a few here, who defend moreso than the site, the ideals of what this site is supposed to be.
Jen, Jackie, and Linda can come back like a she-bear defending her cub. NEVER would *I* want to be on the wrong side of these, and God Bless them for it.
Rabbit has a way of blatantly stating what should be obvious in ways that I highly respect, if not always agree with. ( but most of the time wish I'd said it first )
I've yet to see anyone better than Rudie at mastering the repartee, subtlety, and out-right "correctness" of content.
There are a few WONDERFUL people on this site, not restricted to the special mentions here.
We've lost more than a few good women due mostly to bad men. It both embarrasses, and shames me to just be a man when this happens.
With deepest appreciation for those that stay.........ReactReply - NU
NutsyUkFeb 7, 2010Sorry what exactly did these people do in the chat room? Some one made a
sexual comment? Sure this site isn’t a hook up site and not a sex site. But
this is an adult site. Where its members are adults.Are you not adult enough to deal with such a situation rationally?
Before you all go grabbing the pitch forks and torches grow up a little and
behave appropriately, this site has features for dealing with unwanted
attention. Flag the person if there being abusive and insulting. Block them if
they are irritating you. If some one is upsetting you get the attention of the
site to deal with it. Don’t just run away.But to be honest what irritates me more is the overreaction of some of the
people in this thread.Your adults. Deal with it like adults not children.
ReactReply - COCurt, or CowboyFeb 7, 2010[quote]Sorry what exactly did these people do in the chat room? Some one made a sexual comment? Sure this site isn’t a hook up site and not a sex site. But this is an adult site. Where its members are adults. [/quote] Methinks that if someone made "a" sexual comment, there wouldn't be a problem. Adults can be adults, but when supposed adults become mindless inconsiderate animals......ReactReply
- BLblueiron35Original PosterFeb 7, 2010
Ill try to turn a little spin on this so as to give some positive feedback. The lady I posted this about did come back. She decided that due to the great people here who showed their support that she would give it another try. I think it says a lot about the great people here when even after continued harrassment a member will come back to the site. As for the post about being adults and handling things like adults, we are adults and do not see the need to put up with juvenile comments from those who view this site as a sexual place. We can all handle the small jokes and comments meant in good natured fun but we will not tolerate out right rudeness. That is not what this site is about.
ReactReply - BLblueiron35Original PosterFeb 7, 2010
There are good people in the chatroom. But for the mostpart, the "trash" seems to stay out of the forum. Most people posting here are actually here for interaction with other people, information on nudism and for meeting nice people who share common interests. I would suggest looking at a persons profile first, maybe sending them a message asking about them and then looking at their groups and at some of their posts. That is about the best way to get an idea about a person without getting to actually meet them. If everything you see looks genuine then move on to chat and strike up some convo with them. Lots of great people here in chat and on the forums.
ReactReply - COCurt, or CowboyFeb 7, 2010[quote]I have made apologies to individuals on the site do to actions of others. I made one just before coming to this thread because she was being attacked due to her choice of a screen name. No where as offensive as many others in use. But I do this individually and not in the public forums. So let the fun and games begin.[/quote] The fun and games will be with us as long as tight moderation is absent. There have been a few with whom I've had running conversations, suddenly gone. It's a matter of administration, IMHO, nothing more.ReactReply
- NUNutsyUkFeb 8, 2010[quote]For anyone willing to join the force, here's your semi-unofficial badge:
[/quote]
So now the vigilantism starts...ReactReply - MEMemberFeb 8, 2010[quote]For anyone willing to join the force, here's your semi-unofficial badge:[/quote]
EACH AND EVERY member who enters the chatroom or is on this site is TASKED with reporting inappropriate banter, acts, rule breakers and such, there is NO FORCE to join, and it shouldn't be paraded that there is one. Gives the wrong impression to some of the newer members that there is such a thing. New members should be encouraged to report as tasked, those actions that will scar this site.
Enciting a notion that there's a group of people here that are "Chat room police" is NOT a healthy thing.
SReactReply
- CAcatbirdFeb 8, 2010[quote]Show of hands: who else took post #39 seriously? Jeez.
[/quote]
I didn't take it seriously. I have seen it before in another thread, and I then thought it hilarious.
Nevertheless, I agree with Steve that the post wasn't so wise. Anybody who took post #39 seriously would have a negative opinion of the chat room.ReactReply - NI
niceguyca08Feb 8, 2010I'm really sorry to hear about this. There are so many pervs and jerks out there. Isn't there something the site can do to moderate or administrate the chat rooms and create some order?
ReactReply - MEMemberFeb 8, 2010[quote]I have purged the post and deleted that unutterably offensive badge graphic from Photobucket so as to avoid any possible further misunderstandings. Hopefully, the fluffy bunny will not be misinterpreted. Egad. As for chat, is not this entire thread based on the consequences of its negative nature?[/quote] The badge in and of it's self is quite amusing, Nudein. We both laughed the first time we saw it. The point I think is, that no should be under the impression that it is only up to a few to "patrol" the chat room. It is the responsibility of anyone and everyone to uphold the rules they agree to when they enter the chat room. And that includes rule #5 - Flag users who do not follow the rules While there are many regulars who do this, there are still those who don't, because for whatever reason they believe it is being taken care of by others and they don't have to. What many do NOT understand is that a profile does not get banned because of one or two flags. It takes many flags with valid reasons before it is removed. When you have a chatroom with 30-40 people in it, and only two of those people flag an abuser, nothing happens. It really does take everyone acting like responsible adults.ReactReply