what`s wrong with single male nudists? — General Discussion on True Nudists

NorthernHuskyOriginal Poster

Nov 6, 2009

I;ve been looking at differen nudist events and certain beaches/resorts and alot of them say couples or single women only. so single women can visit but not single men. I happen to be single so i cant vist any of these places, is there a reasoning behind it.

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ST
Stephen
Nov 6, 2009
Yes Josh, there is a reason for it. However, it's a fairly unfounded and sexist generalisation that gets talked about here a lot it seems. Basically, there is a view that too many single nudists are there to just perve on naked women, are perverts or have a belief that nudity equates to some sort of sexual invitation. Also, single nudist women (also a sexist generalisation) seem to be uncomfortable with their nakedness seeming to be an open invitation for naked single men to hit on them. Naturally this is in fact a broad generalisation and is not true of all single nudists (male or female) but these places and events seem to take license to exclude single men in an effort to prevent the single girls from feeling objectified and to prevent a string of single male gawkers just there to perve. Never mind the fact that some singles may actually want to try to use these events to find a partner with similar interests. As many men have said, "Why is it so difficult to find a nudist partner?". Well, you have the answer. I know heaps of straight male nudists who are married to textile women probably for the very reason that once a male hits 18 and can go to these events and places on his own, he seems to be no longer welcome.

I think it is a sad side effect of the fact that men are far more open about nudity than women even in the home and as a result there are more single men who are nudists than there are women. I guess the women feel overwhelmed by the number of "suiters".
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CA
catbird
Nov 6, 2009
I have heard it said that if men far outnumber women, the women are reluctant to go there. That is why the concern about gender balance.
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GA
gabare
Nov 6, 2009
it is certsinly a double standard but nowdays is better than yesterday, back in the 70's and early 80's when i was single and wanted to visit nudist resorts i was turned away and told couples only, after first divorce in the 90's i continued visiting and being a member of the nudist community as a single so times are certainly better. as for nude beaches i don't see any restriction there.
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ME
Member
Nov 6, 2009
All good comments, and a good forum topic, Josh.
If a business owner thinks it is good for business to keep a nudist resort "balanced" and limit excess males, I'm pretty sure it is within a private club's rights to do so. It pisses some of us off, but bottom line, some couples or single females are not completely comfortable in a nudist environment surrounded by an overwhelming amount of single men. Nude public lands are a totally different story. Single men should always have just as much right to access to public beaches as anyone else, and if that isn't the case somewhere, that has to change. Personally, as a currently single male who'd like my next relationship to be with a woman who is comfortable nude (everywhere), I'm going to spend my vacation where I'm wanted. I don't want to be in a nudist resort that restricts members anyways.
Maybe I'm overly influenced by science, but I think the brainstems of men have instilled some biological instincts which tend towards procreation (in volume), moreso in "spreading those genes" into the population, and women have a bit more of a vested interest in choosing the right mate (y'know because she's stuck carrying that bundle of joy around for 9 mo). Not that we don't have a choice in the degree to which we follow our brainstems (we do-some moreso than others), but just that men are hormonally more prone to be more outgoing, and we as a group can be more aggressive. Though that doesn't explain it all, I think it is a component behind the fact that women are not in numbers as likely to feel as comfortable amongst large numbers of single nudists of the opposite sex (though there are definitely some excellent contrarians here--thank God for them!). She is in some basic way in demand, and may feel so, so when she wants to vacation, she might not want to be accosted from all sides. It's her right to choose her vacation surroundings where she feels comfortable.
There is a hormonal component here is all I'm saying. Not that nudism is inherently sexual, and probably those of us males that are offended are so because we don't connect nudism and sexuality. Others (of both sexes) may not be quite so purely naturist, both men and women, and I think there are a fair number in this category (and maybe another subset that when single don't sense a sexual element but when with a sig other, sense it only then). I think a subset of those in a given nudist sites are not purely naturists (or maybe just human and a little bit jealous though naturists) are responsible for this prejudice we feel, both because they make nudism into a sexual experience for others AND BECAUSE THEY MISJUDGE THOSE OF US THAT DON'T INTEND ON BEING SEXUAL AT ALL. Both of these-the horny nude and the anxious one-have cash and seek nudist sites and a component of the tourist market tries to maximize profits from these people in different ways. Not all restrict though, so find and support those that support the true naturist whether male or female, single or couple, I say.
Another thing I plan to do when I find that great nudist woman I seek is to continue to support my favorite beaches/resorts once I convert from a single nudist to (hopefully some day) a member of a nudist couple. If you complain now that you are being prejudged had better stay real and bring that special lady with you to the spots that accepted you when single (if she is comfortable there of course).
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ME
Member
Nov 6, 2009
All good comments, and a good forum topic, Josh.
If a business owner thinks it is good for business to keep a nudist resort "balanced" and limit excess males, I'm pretty sure it is within a private club's rights to do so. It pisses some of us off, but bottom line, some couples or single females are not completely comfortable in a nudist environment surrounded by an overwhelming amount of single men. Nude public lands are a totally different story. Single men should always have just as much right to access to public beaches as anyone else, and if that isn't the case somewhere, that has to change. Personally, as a currently single male who'd like my next relationship to be with a woman who is comfortable nude (everywhere), I'm going to spend my vacation where I'm wanted. I don't want to be in a nudist resort that restricts members anyways.
Maybe I'm overly influenced by science, but I think the brainstems of men have instilled some biological instincts which tend towards procreation (in volume), moreso in "spreading those genes" into the population, and women have a bit more of a vested interest in choosing the right mate (y'know because she's stuck carrying that bundle of joy around for 9 mo). Not that we don't have a choice in the degree to which we follow our brainstems (we do-some moreso than others), but just that men are hormonally more prone to be more outgoing, and we as a group can be more aggressive. Though that doesn't explain it all, I think it is a component behind the fact that women are not in numbers as likely to feel as comfortable amongst large numbers of single nudists of the opposite sex (though there are definitely some excellent contrarians here--thank God for them!). She is in some basic way in demand, and may feel so, so when she wants to vacation, she might not want to be accosted from all sides. It's her right to choose her vacation surroundings where she feels comfortable.
There is a hormonal component here is all I'm saying. Not that nudism is inherently sexual, and probably those of us males that are offended are so because we don't connect nudism and sexuality. Others (of both sexes) may not be quite so purely naturist, both men and women, and I think there are a fair number in this category (and maybe another subset that when single don't sense a sexual element but when with a sig other, sense it only then). I think a subset of those in a given nudist sites are not purely naturists (or maybe just human and a little bit jealous though naturists) are responsible for this prejudice we feel, both because they make nudism into a sexual experience for others AND BECAUSE THEY MISJUDGE THOSE OF US THAT DON'T INTEND ON BEING SEXUAL AT ALL. Both of these-the horny nude and the anxious one-have cash and seek nudist sites and a component of the tourist market tries to maximize profits from these people in different ways. Not all restrict though, so find and support those that support the true naturist whether male or female, single or couple, I say.
Another thing I plan to do when I find that great nudist woman I seek is to continue to support my favorite beaches/resorts once I convert from a single nudist to (hopefully some day) a member of a nudist couple. If you complain now that you are being prejudged had better stay real and bring that special lady with you to the spots that accepted you when single (if she is comfortable there of course).
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ME
Member
Nov 6, 2009
my bad, double verbose! It's a topic that really gets me p#$%ed sometimes!
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CO
Curt, or Cowboy
Nov 7, 2009
Zealous, you and I are in total agreement.
Very well said.
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PH
Philfreeeuk
Nov 7, 2009
[quote]I;ve been looking at differen nudist events and certain beaches/resorts and alot of them say couples or single women only. so single women can visit but not single men. I happen to be single so i cant vist any of these places, is there a reasoning behind it.[/quote] See also:Single Males, the victims of perversion!Single Males
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PH
Philfreeeuk
Nov 7, 2009
[quote]I kind of sense that kind of vibe here, on this web site as well...there are a lot of women who don't want single men for "Friends"...their profile will say something like, "I will consider women and couples only as friends"...It is too bad that a few bad apples have to ruin it for the rest of us![/quote] Though to be fair, the fact that some of those will be lesbians, probably makes it seem worse.
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VI
Visaman666
Nov 8, 2009
I think there was a law in the United States that limted the amount of
single men that could gather in a hotel room. gay men would find women
(usually escorts) to attend the parties (beards), in order to
circumvent the law. This rule at nudist camps could be a relic of that
long forgotten law.
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WH
wheelzzs
Nov 8, 2009
Don't forget the married men that are out playing around. This also stops this type of activity at least aound us. I know clubs that will only alow one visit by a married man w/o his spouce being with him.
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RM
RMitch
Nov 8, 2009
Its all a comfort issue. Single women have no problem with a married man perving on them, because he is married.
It can be ridiculous. I've been on beaches before, and seen married, or "acceptable" men go so far as to inappropriately touch a female in their group, and its not issue. But dare I make eye contact or cast a friendly smile with this same female, in passing, and I'm labelled a perv. Only to then become the subject to whispers and stares by that group.
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RM
RMitch
Nov 8, 2009
[quote]As a married man with a non-nudist wife I find myself in a position where I don't care whether clubs accept unaccompanied men or not because my wife says she wouldn't like the idea of me joining one. Which is interesting because she says she has no problem with me being alone with other women and beaches are OK. I think it is the membership of the club she doesn't like the idea of. (I've never thought of asking) Anyway I've diverted off track. I'd be interested to know whether the clubs that don't accept single men actually have many single female members. Are these clubs at the limit of their membership or are they struggling to survive? Are single women more likely to be attracted to a club that only has married men as members? Is it the female members who don't want single men or is it the male members of the club? I'm just curious. [/quote] My assumption would be that it is the male members of the club who wish to see female-exclusivity. "Couples Only" comes with the inference that a female is present, and therefore, eye candy is present. I work at a night club, and it is exactly the same thing. If you're a single male you have less of a chance of getting in than if you're with a female. And females pretty much get in free. The only difference is that the nightclub environment doesn't try to claim to be a, "non-sexual environment", whereas the alleged, "nudist" (more like swinger) community claims to be.
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CA
catbird
Nov 8, 2009
A single male with a AANR membership card has a somewhat better status, as far as getting admitted to some nudist resorts.
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AN
Andrew
Nov 8, 2009
I'm just wondering what would happen if me and my partner (male) came to one of these clubs or camps? I mean, we're not single men, so it must be OK for us then to join or visit?
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CO
Curt, or Cowboy
Nov 8, 2009
The few ( very few ) places I've been, same-sex couples are treated as two singles. A hetro couple, such as me and my sister, are treated as a couple. ( though the rules technically say we *should* be treated as two singles, since a sibling is not a "couple" )
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MI
Miss_Linda
Nov 9, 2009
For all of the complaining I see about single men not being allowed in nudist resorts, I cannot help but wonder aloud; why doesn't one of these guys open their very own resort and prove the viability of such a place? Put your money where your mouth is at! As to people saying; "women or couples only" on their profiles, well...mine does not say that. I'm guessing that you need to look for the profiles of men, lesbian women and couples where the man is running the profile in order to find such a demand. By the way, men, women and couples, gay, bi or hetero, are welcome to be my friends just so long as they know how to correspond appropriately in this environment and are not ashamed to show their faces here.
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CA
catbird
Nov 9, 2009
[quote]The few ( very few ) places I've been, same-sex couples are treated as two singles. A hetro couple, such as me and my sister, are treated as a couple. ( though the rules technically say we *should* be treated as two singles, since a sibling is not a "couple" )[/quote] Again, that is a matter of gender balance, Curt.
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AN
Andrew
Nov 9, 2009
[quote]The few ( very few ) places I've been, same-sex couples are treated as two singles. A hetro couple, such as me and my sister, are treated as a couple. ( though the rules technically say we *should* be treated as two singles, since a sibling is not a "couple" )[/quote] I think the statement above goes for US, but not for most European countries. It's in fact discrimination to treat same-sex couples as two singles. We, me and my partner, have so far had no problem at any beach or resort or whatever when travelling in Europe at least.
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CO
Curt, or Cowboy
Nov 9, 2009
[quote][quote]The few ( very few ) places I've been, same-sex couples are treated as two singles. A hetro couple, such as me and my sister, are treated as a couple. ( though the rules technically say we *should* be treated as two singles, since a sibling is not a "couple" )[/quote] Again, that is a matter of gender balance, Curt.[/quote] Yes, I know. As I've posted elsewhere, sometimes it begins to seem that I'm the only single male who has none of these "single male" problems. I know the policy where I visit. ( I both read them and verbally ask ) I'm as friendly as I always am. No problem. ( yes, I was looked at hard the first visit or two, but why would there be an issue with that ? )
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MI
Miss_Linda
Nov 10, 2009
Good answer, Art!
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