ME
MemberOriginal Poster
Mar 14, 2021If someone even dares to mention they are anything other than straight in the chatroom, they are immediately chastised for it. They will have more than one person jump on them telling them "NO-ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR SEXUAL ORIENTATION!"
Ok so some people really don't care about sexual orienation at all, I'm one of thse people. I will simply read it when someone says they are gay or bisexual and just ignore it, I don't really have an opinion either way because it doesn't make any difference to me, it neither negatively or positively impacts my existence. That's literally the defintion of not caring about sexual orientation.
If you're having to make a point about how little you care about sexual orientation, to the point where you feel the need to type in BLOCK CAPITAL LETTERS: "NO-ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR SEXUAL ORIENTATION", that suggests that actually you care quite a lot about the fact that someone has had the nerve to mention that they are bisexual or gay.
If it's not an issue, then why do these people make such an issue out of it? There is no rule anywhere, either in the chatroom rules or the terms of service that says a person cannot mention their sexual orientation. There is a rule that says "No sexual discussion" but simply mentioning your orientation whatever it may be doesn't break that rule at all. Saying you're gay doesn't mean you're trying to have cybersex with the entire chatroom or even just one person in the chatroom.
Now if it were just one or two regular usrrs who had a problem, that's one thing. When it's two chatroom moderators who are making up chatroom rules as they go along, that's quite another. One chatroom moderator "Rosey" recently told a friend of mine that she wasn't allowed to ask someone if they were gay. Nothing about that in the rules but apparently it's not allowed.
More recently CplMoe71 made an issue out of the non-issue of mentioning sexual orientation with an all block capitals warning to a user for mentioning something which no-one cares about (screenshot below):
So I ask again, if mentioning sexual orientation is not an issue, because no-one cares about it (remember?), then why do these people make such an issue out of it? The only conclusion I can come to, unless someone else has any other ideas, is that the people making an issue out of it whilst simultaneously not caring are actually rather homophobic and detest the idea that some people are slightly different to them.
I can't discuss this further with CplMoe71 as he kicked me out of the chatroom for asking him why he was making an issue out of a non-issue. So that seems to be his only solution, to abuse his powers to avoid answering awkward questions about why he has such a problem with people mentioning sexual orientation in the chatroom.
In short CplMoe71 was breaking a written rule: "Be nice, no rudity harrassing or trolling" and harrassing/flaming a user for mentioning sexual orientation in order to enforce a rule that doesn't even exist. Then he further abused his power and banned people from the chatroom for pointing this out.
It's worth noting CplMoe71 usues "Cpl" in his username to indicate he's part of a couple.... NO-ONE CARES THAT HE'S IN A STRAGHT RELATIONSHIP AND PART OF A COUPLE, NO-ONE CARES!! SO WHY DO WE NEED TO KNOW THIS?
I don't want or need an answer to the above question because I actually don't care, it really doesn't affect me. But I'm not going to fund this site while intolerance such as homophobia are allowed to go unchallenged. If moderators can't be impartial and tolerant of people then they really shouldn't be moderators.
Ok so some people really don't care about sexual orienation at all, I'm one of thse people. I will simply read it when someone says they are gay or bisexual and just ignore it, I don't really have an opinion either way because it doesn't make any difference to me, it neither negatively or positively impacts my existence. That's literally the defintion of not caring about sexual orientation.
If you're having to make a point about how little you care about sexual orientation, to the point where you feel the need to type in BLOCK CAPITAL LETTERS: "NO-ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR SEXUAL ORIENTATION", that suggests that actually you care quite a lot about the fact that someone has had the nerve to mention that they are bisexual or gay.
If it's not an issue, then why do these people make such an issue out of it? There is no rule anywhere, either in the chatroom rules or the terms of service that says a person cannot mention their sexual orientation. There is a rule that says "No sexual discussion" but simply mentioning your orientation whatever it may be doesn't break that rule at all. Saying you're gay doesn't mean you're trying to have cybersex with the entire chatroom or even just one person in the chatroom.
Now if it were just one or two regular usrrs who had a problem, that's one thing. When it's two chatroom moderators who are making up chatroom rules as they go along, that's quite another. One chatroom moderator "Rosey" recently told a friend of mine that she wasn't allowed to ask someone if they were gay. Nothing about that in the rules but apparently it's not allowed.
More recently CplMoe71 made an issue out of the non-issue of mentioning sexual orientation with an all block capitals warning to a user for mentioning something which no-one cares about (screenshot below):
So I ask again, if mentioning sexual orientation is not an issue, because no-one cares about it (remember?), then why do these people make such an issue out of it? The only conclusion I can come to, unless someone else has any other ideas, is that the people making an issue out of it whilst simultaneously not caring are actually rather homophobic and detest the idea that some people are slightly different to them.
I can't discuss this further with CplMoe71 as he kicked me out of the chatroom for asking him why he was making an issue out of a non-issue. So that seems to be his only solution, to abuse his powers to avoid answering awkward questions about why he has such a problem with people mentioning sexual orientation in the chatroom.
In short CplMoe71 was breaking a written rule: "Be nice, no rudity harrassing or trolling" and harrassing/flaming a user for mentioning sexual orientation in order to enforce a rule that doesn't even exist. Then he further abused his power and banned people from the chatroom for pointing this out.
It's worth noting CplMoe71 usues "Cpl" in his username to indicate he's part of a couple.... NO-ONE CARES THAT HE'S IN A STRAGHT RELATIONSHIP AND PART OF A COUPLE, NO-ONE CARES!! SO WHY DO WE NEED TO KNOW THIS?
I don't want or need an answer to the above question because I actually don't care, it really doesn't affect me. But I'm not going to fund this site while intolerance such as homophobia are allowed to go unchallenged. If moderators can't be impartial and tolerant of people then they really shouldn't be moderators.
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Replies
- ST
StevieLornaApr 10, 2021Someones sexual preference is their own business, it shouldnt matter to anyone else. You are free to be who you are and that is as it should be.
That being said, I used to use the chat room a few years back, I never once felt the need to mention the sex of the people I was attracted to. Thats just not why I was in the room.
ReactReply - MEMemberOriginal PosterApr 11, 2021[quote]Someones sexual preference is their own business, it shouldnt matter to anyone else. You are free to be who you are and that is as it should be. That being said, I used to use the chat room a few years back, I never once felt the need to mention the sex of the people I was attracted to. Thats just not why I was in the room.[/quote] Well that's fine and that's your choice. If you are, for example, an electrician and you went into the chatroom and said "Hi I'm an electrician" would you expect other users and moderators to flame you with "NO-ONE CARES IF YOU'RE AN ELECTRICIAN! WHY DO WE CARE THAT YOU'RE AN ELECTRCIAN? IT'S NOTHING TO DO WITH NUDISM, IT'S NOT APPRECIATED!" before getting a 24 hour chatroom ban?ReactReply
- MEMemberOriginal PosterApr 11, 2021[quote]Thank you for posting this. I would like to think that homophobia was not something that I encountered in a nudist context....[/quote]
No it probably isn't at actual nudst resorts. It happens here though, which is why I've started screenshotting various incidents of ths. It can't be allowed to continue.
CplMoe71 recently told me that the rule of thumb is this: "RULE of THUMB. If you don't do it in public.... DO NOT do it here...". Clearly he's talking absolute bullshIt, because there's no way it would be tolerated if he walked up to a person and screamed in their face that "NO-ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR SEXUALITY. IT'S NOT APPRECIATED! STOP TALKING ABOUT YOUR SEXUALITY!" If he tried that in real life anywhere (nudist resort or not), he would be swiftly escorted off site for harrassment. It's even one of the written chatroom rules to not harrass other users, and yet I've got proof that's exactly what he does, and then abuses his power in order to enforce rules that don't even exist.ReactReply - ST
SteveApr 11, 2021I rarely identify myself as gay. But as I'm a male, and married to a man, that can lead to odd misunderstandings, since the assumption is that everyone is straight. My partner's name isn't plainly gendered, so the assumptions and the reality can veer pretty far apart for a remarkably long time. That assumption system - all the hippopotamus dancing in the cartoon are male, unless they're wearing pearls and lipstick, all the married men are married to women, all the faceless usernames are of white people - gets old. Yes, if you are a straight, white, male then all those assumptions work for you, feel completely natural, and produce no surprises, so why would you ever specify? But if one is a person the general assumptions don't apply to (and this is most of us, actually), then the choice is either to wait for the little surprise to come up at some random point, or to get ahead of it and proceed with more clarity. Offering a brief description of oneself isn't "pride", or confrontation. Its a perfectly conventional introductory strategy and conversation-starter. If it really bothers you, your politics are showing.
ReactReply - STStevieLornaApr 11, 2021[quote] Well that's fine and that's your choice. If you are, for example, an electrician and you went into the chatroom and said "Hi I'm an electrician" would you expect other users and moderators to flame you with "NO-ONE CARES IF YOU'RE AN ELECTRICIAN! WHY DO WE CARE THAT YOU'RE AN ELECTRCIAN? IT'S NOTHING TO DO WITH NUDISM, IT'S NOT APPRECIATED!" before getting a 24 hour chatroom ban?[/quote] My point was, if you enter a chat room for nudists and then declare to a room of strangers that you are gay/straight/other then Im not surprised you were banned.ReactReply
- MEMemberOriginal PosterApr 11, 2021[quote] My point was, if you enter a chat room for nudists and then declare to a room of strangers that you are gay/straight/other then Im not surprised you were banned.[/quote] 1: I wasn't banned for saying it. I was banned when I defended someone else who said it after he was set upon by a user and also a moderator. I told them to stop harassing said user (which actually does break one of the written chatroom rules: No harassment) in order to enforce a rule that doesn't exist. 2: You've avoided my other question completely. If you announced you were an electrician in the chatroom, would you expect to get a 24 hour ban for it, since "no-one cares"?ReactReply
- STStevieLornaApr 11, 2021
I didnt avoid it, Ive never announced to a nudist chat room that Im a builder either. (I am)
ReactReply - MEMemberOriginal PosterApr 11, 2021[quote]I didnt avoid it, Ive never announced to a nudist chat room that Im a builder either. (I am)[/quote] No that doesn't answer it at all, please answer this: If you announced in the chatroom that you are a builder would you also not be surprised when people , including moderators, started flaming and harassing you for saying you are a builder, because NO-ONE CARES! WE DON'T NEED TO KNOW YOU'RE A BUILDER.... NO-ONE CARES REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE..... ?ReactReply
- STStevieLornaApr 11, 2021
Once again, Ive never done it and would consider it a silly thing to do and expect others to think it silly and irrelevant.
ReactReply - MEMemberOriginal PosterApr 11, 2021[quote]Once again, Ive never done it and would consider it a silly thing to do and expect others to think it silly and irrelevant.[/quote] Yep, so once again you're deliberately avoiding the question. That's obviously not what I've asked.ReactReply
- STStevieLornaApr 11, 2021
You are not getting the answer you want to hear, sorry about that.
Im siding with the Mod and the others in the chat room even though I rarely use it now.
ReactReply - MEMemberApr 11, 2021
At this rate, no one will be able to say anything in chat. Why even the usual naked hugs, cyber kisses, and how is the weather will be off limits.
ReactReply - MEMemberOriginal PosterApr 11, 2021[quote]You are not getting the answer you want to hear, sorry about that. Im siding with the Mod and the others in the chat room even though I rarely use it now.[/quote] I know I'm not getting the answer. Because you're deliberately answering questions I HAVEN'T ASKED and avoiding the one question I HAVEasked, and it's now obvious exactly why you're deliberately avoiding the question. I DIDN'T ASK if you've ever gone into the chatroom and announced either your sexuality or job occupation. I also DIDN'T ASK if you would ever go into the chatroom and announce either your sexuality or job occupation. You've answered both of those questions already, but they AREN'T the questions I asked. The question I asked was this: IF you announced in the chatroom that you are a builder would you also not be surprised when people , including moderators, started flaming and harassing you for saying you are a builder (or electrician), and then would you expect to be banned for 24 hours for simply saying it? I know exactly now why you're not answering this..... I think we can all work it out.ReactReply
- AL
AlApr 11, 2021[quote]At this rate, no one will be able to say anything in chat. Why even the usual naked hugs, cyber kisses, and how is the weather will be off limits.[/quote] Which is the real reason that I gave up on using the chatroom at all. I don't find anything interesting going on there.ReactReply - STStevieLornaApr 11, 2021Getting a chat room ban really upsets some people.
Perhaps they should be more friendlyReactReply - MEMemberApr 11, 2021[quote]At this rate, no one will be able to say anything in chat. Why even the usual naked hugs, cyber kisses, and how is the weather will be off limits.Which is the real reason that I gave up on using the chatroom at all. I don't find anything interesting going on there.[/quote]
How can there be anything interesting going on? Intelligent conversation? Forget about it. The resident lynch mob prefers to complain about anything and everything and shut any conversations down fast.ReactReply - MEMemberOriginal PosterApr 11, 2021[quote]Getting a chat room ban really upsets some people. Perhaps they should be more friendly[/quote] And what exactly is unfriendly about saying you're gay or bisexual? What's so offensive qabout it that it causes others to harass you and earns you a chatroom ban?ReactReply
- GO
Gordy57Apr 13, 2021[quote]Getting a chat room ban really upsets some people. Perhaps they should be more friendly And what exactly is unfriendly about saying you're gay or bisexual? What's so offensive qabout it that it causes others to harass you and earns you a chatroom ban?[/quote] You will get the same reaction if you bring up Politics, Religion, Abortion, Gun control.... Some people are adamant about those subjects, but it is generally known you don't bring them up unless you are on a site specifically for that subject. Someone mentioned my profile says I am straight. He is correct, and I would not have mentioned it here (or in other posts) if he had not brought it up. You could say I don't feel the need to advertise or push an agenda farther into public view in an attempt to gain acceptance. IMHO This Covid thing is a minor issue compared to the mass insanity in the general population. Far too many people pushing agendas with the "Me first, screw you" attitude :-( Can't we all just get along.ReactReply - STStevieLornaApr 13, 2021
I understand and totally agree Raphael.
I still find it odd that someone would enter a chat room and the first thing they tell people is their sexual preference. Why would it matter?
ReactReply - MEMemberOriginal PosterApr 13, 2021[quote]I understand and totally agree Raphael. I still find it odd that someone would enter a chat room and the first thing they tell people is their sexual preference. Why would it matter?[/quote] You're asking why would it matter, yet earlier you said you are on the side of the moderators who were harassing and bullying a user for saying he was gay. The question is why does it matter to you? If it doesn't matter, why are you taking the side of the moderators, or even taking a side at all? It doesn't matter does it? You shouldn't be on either "side". I know you're deliberatley going to avoid answering this question as well, arent you? You're just going to answer a question I haven't asked, and we all know why.ReactReply
- MEMemberOriginal PosterApr 13, 2021[quote]You will get the same reaction if you bring up Politics, Religion, Abortion, Gun control.... [/quote] Ok, so you're saying you're uncomfortable or even offended by the fact that someone's mentioned their sexuality. Why is that anyone else's problem apart from yours? [quote] You could say I don't feel the need to advertise or push an agenda.. IMHO This Covid thing is a minor issue compared to the mass insanity in the general population. Far too many people pushing agendas with the "Me first, screw you" attitude :-( [/quote] Who is trying to push an agenda, and what agenda is it you think they are trying to push? How is someone mentioning their sexuality a massive "Screw you" to you? Why have you interpreted their existence as such an affront to yours? [quote]Can't we all just get along.[/quote] Yeah sure, we can all get along if you can accept that some people are different to you. If you interpret someone saying they are gay or bisexual as them telling you "Me first, Screw you" then that's you taking offense to someone else's existence and therefore you're the one causing the division.ReactReply
- DD
DduthieJun 4, 2021This is all so well put!
ReactReply - MEMemberJun 12, 2021[quote]This is all so well put![/quote] What is all so well put? Anything and everything that everyone has said here? Sounds like someone I used to work with. He always agreed with everyone regardless of what they said - lol. Good way to get along with everyone.ReactReply
- MEMemberJun 12, 2021
I think weve all gone off the deep end myself.
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