Undressing: it should be simple, but is it? — Couple's Room on True Nudists

nudonyOriginal Poster

Nov 15, 2022

I was reading a thread (on another MB) that dealt with the act of undressing. Some people stated that it is one of their favorite parts of "entering the nudist world." It marks the "transition" from the "textile world" to the "nudist world"; and for some, there is even some enjoyment derived from seeing other people seeing them join in. Myself, when it comes to disrobing, it does not matter who is around; it is not something I consider a "private act." At the nude beach, I have disrobed around many people without thinking much about it.

And then I thought: "My wife feels very differently about it."

I have asked her about it, and her response has been a jumble of mixed emotions. But after peeling away at the layers, I was able to determine several causes.

First, it makes her feel as though she is "putting on a show." I can understand that. I've seen women arrive at the nude beach fully dressed; and then go through the rigmarole of "slithering" out of tight jeans or shorts, "wrestling" with unclasping their bra, and then "tug away" at their undies to get them off. By the end of it, they've got a "captive audience" of men attentively watching the whole thing transpire. For a newbie or a shy person, this is probably not the best way to remain inconspicuous. I call it the "striptease effect." My wife's method for avoiding this is to wear a strapless onesie, and after checking in, she goes back to the car; and with a simple tug, her onesie is off and she's naked. Our friends are usually already there, and she can join them already naked.

Second, it makes her feel "forced to strip." Our nudist friends have invited us to their home, and my wife is reluctant to accept the invitation, because she doesn't know if she'll have to take her clothes off in front of everyone when we get there. The fact that our friends have all seen her naked has nothing to do with it. She just feels weird about the idea of people waiting on her to get naked and the "pressure" she might feel because of it. We also go to a nudist BnB, where her pattern is similar to the nudist resort. She changes "privately" in our room and initially comes out in a bathrobe. After she's established (positive) contact with the other guests, she'll return to our room and come back out naked. No one will ever see her actually undress; as she'll keep the "act" confined to our bedroom. And she doesn't feel "forced."

The third reason...I'm not sure about. But it seems about controlling how people "see her." Perhaps it's because she feels she can express "naked confidence" more visibly when she can dispense with the formality of being seen undressing. Who knows?

I'm just curious whether it's "just my wife" or if this is a sentiment generally shared by nudist women.

What's your experience?

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TD
Tom D
Nov 15, 2022
I don't consider it a private act either.
When I go to a nude beach, I am usually only wearing short or a swimsuit and flip flops. Therefore, undressing is only removing one item so it isn't a very long show.
The two times I have been to a clothing optional resort, I was only wearing shorts for the drive. I took them off in the car and left them there, not because I didn't want people to see me take them off, but to maximize the clothing free experience.
At the one nude house party I attended, I was told to go into one of the bedrooms and leave my clothing there, so that is what I did. I would have been willing to take them off in the room were most of the guests were but followed the directions of the host.
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SA
Stone Andy
Nov 15, 2022
Undressing may have vulnerability, everything from having a wobbly balance to bending over and hiding/moving ones wallet, watch or other valuables. Therefore it makes sense to have some privacy. When I was at Hippie Hollow I was surprised at how people undressed. Some did it as soon as they could when they left the parking lot (myself included), others went in a bathroom, and others to their spot they wanted to sit or lay down. I hadn't realized how personal the choice was.
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TD
Tom D
Nov 15, 2022
I lock my wallet and phone in the glove box of my car.
Sometimes take off my shorts as soon as I reach the clothing optional area, otherwise when I set up my chair.
Bathrooms are outside the clothing optional area, near the main road.
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GU
Guzzi27
Nov 15, 2022
Have to admit I find it simple but always take steps to keep it simple. If I am going to a nudist venue then I am seldom wearing more than shirts, T-shirt and sandals. So it really is a case of a few seconds and they are all off easily and quickly, no fuss no struggle.
The exception being going to nudist swims/saunas especially in the winter where I would be dressed normally. But then it is just like vetted changed at the gym or swimming pool. Everyone is in a changing room doing exactly the same thing and generally just paying attention to themselves.
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TD
Tom D
Nov 15, 2022
[quote]Have to admit I find it simple but always take steps to keep it simple. If I am going to a nudist venue then I am seldom wearing more than shirts, T-shirt and sandals. So it really is a case of a few seconds and they are all off easily and quickly, no fuss no struggle. The exception being going to nudist swims/saunas especially in the winter where I would be dressed normally. But then it is just like vetted changed at the gym or swimming pool. Everyone is in a changing room doing exactly the same thing and generally just paying attention to themselves.[/quote] I rarely drive with a shirt on in warm weather so it is one less thing to take off when I get there.
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ST
Steve
Nov 16, 2022
I guess I've been on both sides of the equation.
It's nice to be able to discreetly watch a female remove her clothes, even if she stops at her swimsuit. I try to be discrete, but perhaps I fail in the subject's eyes, perhaps she's seen insufficiently-discrete watchers too often or perhaps she's just naturally self-conscious that it might be considered a show. It probably is, unless one tries to tone down the visuals, and depending on the female, in some cases they have to try extremely hard to make it less than a wonderful viewing opportunity.
As a bloke, I can understand the "total non event" feeling from both the undresser's and the viewer's perspective although, with the spectrum of humanity being what it is, it's not always this way. I may just occasionally be inclined to observe a male disrobing. For shedding the clothes myself it also varies. I may strip at the CO zone sign or even before, but likely not if others are nearby and they are clothed and heading my way - I'll let them pass first and likely let them get a little distance from me. If I am past the sign I'll also usually wait if someone's approaching and I think they may misinterpret my signals. (Correct signal: I just want to get nude. Incorrect signal: I'm doing this now just for your benefit.) Once I've picked a spot at a CO beach then (apart from my first-ever visit) the clothing comes off.
For an unofficial CO beach more factors come in to play. Are textiles about? Has anyone else already stripped off? At Noosa's Alexandra Bay, for example, it a well-known unofficial destination and I can't imagine many are surprised if they encounter 100% flesh. Today there were a mix of textile walkers, textile bathers (board shorts, swim brief, bikini, thong), 'occasion nudists' who strip off for the bucket-list dip and then dress again and those more dedicated. My shedding was more discrete and I tried to keep my distance to textiles when walking to and from the water or along the shoreline. That strange balance between discretion in an unofficial area that everyone knows is an unofficial area.
As mentioned above the other aspect is dressing for undressing. For me I had a longish polo covering my Tanga bikini, and sometimes shirtless, sometimes Donald Ducking, sometimes 100%. Minimalist but also with a mind to surroundings and the sunshine.
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ST
StevieLorna
Nov 16, 2022
We generally both undress as soon as its appropriate.
As soon as we get to our room at the resort and as soon as we get to our shopping place at the beach.
At the beach we often used the area in front of the hotel was used by textiles so we had to walk past to get to the CO area, once we found a place to stop we would both strip down then set out our mats and erect the windbreak/tent. Others would set up their stuff before getting nude.
We set up close to the sea, and I like watching the people walking along the shore towards the naturist area and try to decide before hand if the are nudists or just gawkers come up the beach to see nudies. It always made me smile, the ones who stopped to undress.
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TD
Tom D
Nov 16, 2022
[quote]On our first visit, she wore shorts and a t shirt. We picked our spot, set up the chairs and she sat for about 10 mins before proclaiming, "this is stupid. I'm the only one dressed on this beach!" She stood up and dropped her shorts, took off the t shirt and was naked. he shorts and t shirt was all she wore to the beach.. My Annie was the same way, Our first time to Cypress Cove. She insisted she wasn't going to be naked, not her, and threatened me not to bug her about it. We walked to the pool, me already nude, and we picked a spot to settle in. After five minutes she said to me, "this is stupid", stood up and pealed off her two piece and sat back down without a second thought. There seemed to be no reservation to strip in front of the 50 or so people there, who seemed to be paying absolutely no attention to her anyway. She was feeling more embarrassed to be the only one clothed that the thought of being NAKED in public. I was so proud of her. She stripped out of more than her clothes that day! Shedding emotions and insecurities at the same time.[/quote] How did you convince her to go if she wasn't intending to be nude? My wife doesn't want to even see anyone nude except me.
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TD
Tom D
Nov 16, 2022
Now, men pay to watch women undress, women pay to watch men undress and men pay to watch men undress. Haven't heard of women paying to watch women undress.
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ST
StevieLorna
Nov 16, 2022
Ive better things to spend money on.
So has she.
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ST
Steve
Nov 16, 2022
Woodsman wrote [quote][quote]The "sexual response" is starting to wear off now, though.[/quote][/quote] I still see it as somewhat sexual in that a female subject is always going to be of more interest than a male one. I guess to me it's more about sensuality. I don't recall paying any attention to others in the changeroom as a youngster. I just kept about my business. Probably more open now but I don't really frequent changerooms.
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NU
nudonyOriginal Poster
Nov 17, 2022
[quote]On our 3rd visit to this resort, like every visit to our nude beach, Di wore a sundress with nothing on underneath. One tug over the head and she was naked. She said that wearing the sundress and being naked was easier than taking off several layers and "giving them a show." She also said, "it takes the imagination and anticipation right out of the equation." haha[/quote] It does seem that many women ultimately find the "one tug/pull and naked" mode of disrobing more simple and efficient; especially when they know or feel they'll end up naked eventually. My first wife's preference was the sarong; which was probably the most efficient since she'd unfasten it before even arriving at the resort, and just walk out of the car naked. No "open disrobing" involved at all. At non-landed get-togethers (at people's houses) she would arrive dressed and wait until shown the "changing room." I don't recall her ever changing in front of people either; unless when no other option was afforded, and then usually with a sense of discomfort. This idea of avoiding "putting on a show" does seem prevalent. As I mentioned, my wife arrives at the resort knowing that our friends and acquaintances will be there, naked; and that she's going to spend the day naked amongst them. So there's no reason to make disrobing a "suspenseful event" or more "loaded" than it needs to be. So after I open the trunk of the car, "poof" her onesie falls right down to her feet and it's over with. She's now free to go "blend in" with everyone else.
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TD
Tom D
Nov 17, 2022
[quote]On our 3rd visit to this resort, like every visit to our nude beach, Di wore a sundress with nothing on underneath. One tug over the head and she was naked. She said that wearing the sundress and being naked was easier than taking off several layers and "giving them a show." She also said, "it takes the imagination and anticipation right out of the equation." haha It does seem that many women ultimately find the "one tug/pull and naked" mode of disrobing more simple and efficient; especially when they know or feel they'll end up naked eventually. My first wife's preference was the sarong; which was probably the most efficient since she'd unfasten it before even arriving at the resort, and just walk out of the car naked. No "open disrobing" involved at all. At non-landed get-togethers (at people's houses) she would arrive dressed and wait until shown the "changing room." I don't recall her ever changing in front of people either; unless when no other option was afforded, and then usually with a sense of discomfort. This idea of avoiding "putting on a show" does seem prevalent. As I mentioned, my wife arrives at the resort knowing that our friends and acquaintances will be there, naked; and that she's going to spend the day naked amongst them. So there's no reason to make disrobing a "suspenseful event" or more "loaded" than it needs to be. So after I open the trunk of the car, "poof" her onesie falls right down to her feet and it's over with. She's now free to go "blend in" with everyone else.[/quote] Men wearing just shorts also have the efficiency of one tug and naked. .
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Steve
Nov 17, 2022
Even if I'm wearing a shirt and shorts they are off in seconds anyway. I may actually take more time at a textile beach, given my choice of one of my daring swimsuits, compared to a nude one where there's no particular expectations! Another case of undressing being as simple as we make it. Or not.
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ME
Member
Nov 18, 2022
I like this topic!! This is my own opinion. Ive only been to a nudist resort three times. All three times, Ive driven in naked. I prefer not to undress in front of a crowd. So Im only about three years new into this nudist lifestyle, and I dont get to be nude too much because of a house full of people. My upbringing taught me that being nude was associated with sex. Ive learned differently now since meeting my boyfriend. For me, undressing is a sensual thing. I have undressed in front of my boyfriend many times, and Ive seen him undress many times. For me, the anticipation of watching each piece come off of him and whats underneath is such a turn on!!!! Its almost like a bit of foreplay to me. And its even better when he undresses me. So Im with your wife, I like to undress in private.
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ME
Member
Nov 18, 2022
[quote]nudony wrote: My problem is that I want to convey to women that my joy in seeing them in the act of undressing is based on their acceptance of nudity as a proper state of life, and not on whatever erotic undertone is there. That's why it still brings a smile to my face.[/quote] I never wouldve thought this! Again, I grew up around a dad who made sexual comments about women all the time and in front of my mom. It was disgusting to me. Its nice to know that there are men out there who appreciate a womans nudity as a liberating feeling to her, at least thats how it feels for me.
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JO
John
Nov 18, 2022
TM2010 wrote: [quote]In a sense, I can somewhat relate to how the women feel, as there have been a few times at my go-to clothing-optional beach here in Seattle, which is well attended by a mix of straight, gay, bi folks, where there will be more than one man gawking at me as I undress. More than anything, I find it rather annoying/irritating.[/quote] The interesting thing about this sort of situation is that it's an example of a man experiencing what women experience all the time. And it's not only in nude beaches, but anywhere an attractive woman is in a place where men feel they have the license to stare at her. So I can hear her saying, "Welcome to my world." But you end up doing what women do: you power through it, do your thing, and remind yourself that if there's a problem, it's their problem and not your problem.
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ME
Member
Nov 18, 2022
There's a significant amount of social conditioning that underpins anybody's reluctance to 'strip' in public even if they are a confessed and confident nudie.
That social conditioning for the watchers is wrapped up in the fact that humans have used stripping as a form of entertainment for thousands of years. That actual act of transition has been used to arouse, especially men, by all cultures and in all corners of the globe. It's also been given a tone of exclusivity by way of being pushed underground in more prudish times and cultures.
So when a person strips in public even some of the most regular nudies will be 'programmed' to watch.
My personal approach after many initial uncomfortable transitions is to progressively wear less to the beach and shorten the time and ease of transition. When asked I recommend this to all female friends too who are looking to join our liberated and free community!
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NU
nudonyOriginal Poster
Nov 19, 2022
[quote]nudony wrote:My problem is that I want to convey to women that my joy in seeing them in the act of undressing is based on their acceptance of nudity as a proper state of life, and not on whatever erotic undertone is there. That's why it still brings a smile to my face.[/quote] Just wanted to clarify: this is not my quote btw! Lol not a problem; I just don't want to take credit for something someone else said! :) [quote]Ive only been to a nudist resort three times. All three times, Ive driven in naked. [/quote] In the "pro-nudist" short French movie "La Fonte des Neiges" (available somewhere...I can't find it at the moment), the movie literally begins with the "Mom" undressing while driving through to the nudist resort; and then hopping out the car already naked. It exemplified how that's a preference for some women (and a frequent one for men). Initially, when I saw women arriving nude at the resort, I figured it was for the same reason that some men also were. "Unbridled enthusiasm". And whereas that might occasionally bet the case...it clearly wasn't for my aforementioned ex-wife. As I mentioned earlier, after trying different modes of undressing upon arriving at the resort (all of which made her feel awkward), she got into a discussion with a nudist friend - and a "trial run" - of just wearing a sarong on the way to a resort and taking it off along the way. She was "sold." Jumping out of the car naked and heading straight to check-in; and then proceeding to the pool area naked, had allowed her to "by-pass" the disrobing process. But there were several factors that made it easy: clothing was not required to check in, the parking lot was inside the resort; and there was a long gravel road leading up to it. Many resorts are not set up the same way. At resorts where nudity is required all the way up to beyond the main office, disrobing might not be possible until within the resort itself. Unless there are private changing rooms, that's going to make it more difficult to disrobe privately.
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ME
Member
Nov 19, 2022
My wifes method is the simple flimsy coverup removal. She gets to the pool area, usually sits on the edge of the chair & pulls her coverup up & over her head. It takes just a few seconds then its grab the floatie and into the water. The best part is her enjoying the nude time with me. YES!!!
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ST
Steve
Nov 19, 2022
woodsman21 wrote: [quote]The interesting thing about this sort of situation is that it's an example of a man experiencing what women experience all the time.[/quote] It's funny for me as, while I may occasionally be reluctant to strip to in the presence of others I feel it's about me perhaps being too forward. As for their looking they can look as much as they like, it doesn't bother me and is perhaps a little flattering. That brings the other aspect in that I don't feel threatened by their looking when the ladies may not have that same confidence.
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JO
John
Dec 18, 2022
I was just reading about a place where it's not illegal to be naked, but it is illegal to disrobe. Presumably you disrobe in some private place like a tent or a cabin or whatever, and then emerge naked. It's a strange world.
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EA
EarlD
Dec 18, 2022
From what I have heard from female partners over the years for some women being the object of the male gaze in everyday life may be a factor.
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TD
Tom D
Dec 18, 2022
[quote]I was just reading about a place where it's not illegal to be naked, but it is illegal to disrobe. Presumably you disrobe in some private place like a tent or a cabin or whatever, and then emerge naked. It's a strange world.[/quote] I have read that the law in Vermont is like that.
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