Sexual discrimination

Replies

• ME

  Member

  Jan 28, 2009

  [quote][quote]Lookn4sun.  Sorry for the tone of the message on hedonist heterosexual couples.  The www.nudist-resorts.org abuse hurt me very badly and this second post was obviously affected in the language, although the points I made are correct & valid and I stand by them.  Yes guys, I am angry!  Shouldn't I be?[/quote]     I can definatly understand you being angry.  Too many people judge someone by how they are different instead of who they are as a person.  I hope that you enjoy it here, there are a lot of people here that care about the person you are instead of how you are different from them. Thomas[/quote] What a boring place this world would be if we were all the same! Jen

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• WI

  

  WillGolden

  Jan 28, 2009

  Agreed Jen.  But what a better place it would be if I could just find one person the same as me to identify withLOL! But that is the problem for the disabled.  If black people or single men have a problem, they have others like themselves for mutual support.  Then within minutes everybody else rallies around them with support and advice.  But a disabled guy could be the only one in a 5-mile radius. Txag is a genuine, friendly guy and a friend to me though I haven't tagged him yet (ummmmmm...... ok done), but he gave away trends in public attitudes, saying "I don't use race, color, creed, gender, marital status, or sexual orientation to deterime who I become friends with."  Commendable!  But no mention of "physical status"!  This was just an oversight of course; but aren't the disabled always the ones to be forgotten.  We just don't make up sufficient numbers to be noticed. Every month I turn up to a naked disco and socialise with, among others, Patrick, a wheelchair-bound CP sufferer with a Stephen Hawking-style laptop.  He's got more degrees than a Balinese thermometer.  Amazing guy!  Nobody else recognises he is there.  Nobody is being nasty.  I know that!  It is just that fighting racism, sexism etc is fashionable.  But, firstly because there are fewer of us and secondly because we don't quite look right, standing up for the physically unfortunate does not strike the same note. So this monster Kevin treats me as if I am John Merrick, and human nature being what it is, I want revenge.  I want 200 members to leavewww.nudist-resorts.orgin protest.  If he had picked on a black guy like that, they would have all rallied round and left.  There would be a near-riot!  But it just ain't gonna happen for a member of a social group that is a minority even among minorities.  It will change in time.  It did for women, black people, jewish people, gay people etc.  But not yet! Still I have to get on with life.  I have friends in naturism who stand by me, including many here.  All I know is this would never happen at TruNu, CFF, Skinbook, NudistAve, SocialNat and many more.  But still..... I just wish somebody would get this guy for me. Hugs, Will

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• NO

  

  Noblefriend

  Jan 28, 2009

  Great post willy...i know it opened my eyes.  Thank you.

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• TH

  

  ThomasOriginal Poster

  Jan 28, 2009

  Very good post Wily, the reason I didn't use physical status is that I couldn't think of a good term to use till I saw it here.  I did not want to say it in a way that someone would be offended.  BTW, I have already accepted your friend request.
  Thomas

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• ME

  Member

  Jan 28, 2009

  Willy, you make some very valid points that others have brought up around the board regarding the acceptance of those with differences in the nudist lifestyle. I would like to point out though that while nearly everyone on this planet is aware of racial differences there are relatively very few who are aware of your particular condition. I have worked in the emergency medical field for nearly 15 years and have only met one other individual who shares your genetic traits. Consider that people who have no contact what-so-ever with people on that level most likely would never have known that anything like that was even a possibility and perhaps cut them a little slack on the basis of ignorance.
  
  You say that fighting racism, sexism etc. is fashionable. Here in the U.S we have the ADA (Americans with Disabilities Act) that governs by law the treatment and assimilation of those with disabilities in everyday life. I'm sure that the UK has similar laws on the books as well. There are organizations  endorsed by popular celebrities raising money for every disability and disease under the sun.  While you may feel that it is unfashionable to support those with disabilities I don't think that society at large would agree with you. Yes you have run into some simple minded people and for that I empathize with you.
  
  I am in no way saying that the treatment that you have received from that other site is in anyway appropriate nor am I trying to validate their actions. They are deplorable and you have every right to be angry about the treatment you received there.

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• PH

  

  Philfreeeuk

  Jan 28, 2009

  [quote]Great post willy...i know it opened my eyes.  Thank you.[/quote]  ME too! ........are you sure that other site knew you were on the level and didn't think you were some joker messing them around? Hard to believe anyone could be so stupid and crewel, and from a busines piont of view, ......extremly DUM! Another great post from you Steve1, as usual :)   Phil.

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• ME

  Member

  Jan 29, 2009

  Okay, here are some interesting statistics on the members of this site. As of today there are 7143 members 475 listed as females (I am 99 per cent sure one of these is a fake) 542 listed as couples6125listed as males Now I'm no statition, but wonder what percentage of those listed as males (and, NO! I am not going to go through each one and figure out how many are listed as single and how many are married, lol) are here because they are really "true" nudists? Think there's part of your answer, guys, as to why single males are getting such a bad rap. Abuse and inappropriate behavior on this site comes from all three catagories, no question there,  but I find these statitistics staggering. Jen

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• PH

  

  Philfreeeuk

  Jan 29, 2009

  [quote]Jen, I'm not sure if that is a fair question.  I suppose if you could compare these statistics to other social networking sites, I would be interested.  Social sites are meant for people who want to meet others.  Many married people tend to have other married couples as friends and live in nuclear communities base on kids activities, or churches when they are younger.  Many women tend to move in groups also.  Single men have friends, but tend not to reach out the same way.  When we're with other single men, there is almost always a competitive air surrounding the group.  I have trouble actually socializing with other men in person because of the big bull/little bull syndrome.  But on a place like here, we all start out on even ground.  Most interaction is one on one with either other males, couples, or females (with the exception of the chat room).  So, to me, it's not suprising that there are mostly men here.  We're typically looking for entertainment, or something to fill our time, because we have more time on our hands, less responsibilities.  I have kids, but they live on the other side of the country right now, so my physical time with them is extremely limited.  Because I travel, I have very few friends that I can socialize with, and I'm not too crazy about bars.  So, a place like this is very nice for me.  Being a nudist, it just makes sense for me to be on a nudist site.  However, I suppose if I wasn't nudist, I would still find a social networking site to find people I could communicate with on another level.  Maybe that's just me, I don't know, but I would love to know what other's think about it.[/quote]  Well that certainly made a lot of sense.   I also am not into bars and men friends, women are much more interesting and they don't go on about football! (no offence guys!   and this is number 600, I gotta get a life! :( Phil.

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• ME

  Member

  Jan 29, 2009

  Sorry Phil and Lookn, I realize that I didn't make my point very clear.  As, I mentioned I'm no expert on this, but it just seems to me that statistically speaking if you have a group of 475 women there will be a percentage of those that are acting inappropriate, Same with the group of 572 couples.  Now, when it comes to single men your group base is now not in the hundreds but in the thousands! Wouldn't it stand to reason that the percentages would be exponentially higher? Which makes me empathize with all the good guys on this site.  Single males ARE getting a bad rap and there has been a fair amount of "male-bashing".  I just think that the "predator males" are more prominent than the "predator females" because of the muuuch higher numbers. Looking those figures up also opened my eyes as to why there are soooo many single males requesting to be one's "friend". (Which has been a complaint of some people, including myself - see brief mention in earlier post).Withoutknowing these figures, when one log's on, on a daily basis, and sees request after request after request from single men it feels...uncomfortable.  Now I have some demographics behind me, I won't feel so uncomfortable! Hope that makes sense! Jen

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• ME

  Member

  Jan 30, 2009

  Yeah we are pretty well outnumbered here. I think those numbers are probably portray a fairly accurate depiction of who is involved in nudism though. Even if you take away the ones who signed up simply to see nude pictures or to lurk around there would still be a much higher rate of men vs. women. For us guys it's nearly impossible to really shine above the crowd no matter what we are here looking for. I know...the general opinion is that this isn't a dating site so don't even try but what single man, or woman for that matter isn't going to on some level keep their eyes open for a potential partner?
  
  Wow sorry...got side tracked there...Ummmm where was I.....oh yeah back on point. The numbers don't lie. There are more men in the lifestyle than women and the numbers on this site reflect that. Is there any wonder why people would tend to get more friend requests from men than women?

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• PH

  

  Philfreeeuk

  Jan 30, 2009

  Hi guys, I'm just sitting here saying yup, yup ,yup. Thanks Jen for your storey, that kind of thing must be a big help to those trying to help their partners "get it." I realised the stats thing a while back, it was about 13 to 1 then, probably worse now, so I rarely bother to send a request. I've always been uncomfortable with couples, that's mainly why I stopped going to the club after my separation. Realising single females and couples get inundated with requests, I feel much better letting them come to me. If they read the forum for long enough, they will see who I am and If they want a male friend they can be confident that I'm not just here for their wife. Also if they think about it, they will realise that my reluctance to get certified means I can't see their pics, so I'm probably not here for that either. It's a bum deal, but that's the way it has always been for the single guy, I can fully understand singles and couples getting sick of all the hassle, I know I would.   Phil.

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• GA

  

  gabare

  Jan 30, 2009

  Alot of folks on here have no idea or no real desire to be a nudist even if they get that magic stamp truenudist its just something to do, what does someone wearing a thong or sexy lingerie have to do with really being a nudist or being hiked up with your legs spread or a crotch shot of a male. If you look at old photos of nudism from the 30's to maybe the 60's they show it as  healthy and natural not sexy or pornographic, I really believe probably less than fifty percent on this site are real truenudist and thats a shame because it has some great forums and easy to navigate. As for not being accepted as a friend oh well but even I have a problem with the non face photos, who is really there, I don't care if a person is nude or not and they don't need to be buff or beautiful because a real nudist know thats not what nudism is even about.

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• ME

  Member

  Jan 31, 2009

  [quote]Hey steve, I think I will conceed the point that "on some level" I am keeping an eye out for ladies I might have something in common with, which may be the start of something, but I think what we're talking about here is something different.  Simply because, that doesn't explain why so many couples get so many requests.  They are already involved with a partner, so unless they are truely looking for friends (which we've heard from several couples is not happening very often), then they are looking for something else.  These are the people that are giving us such a bad name.  Anyhow, handing the box of to the next person.  Take care.[/quote]    Yeah I got a tad side tracked in that last post. This last couple weeks have been torture at work and my mind is overloaded....so easily side tracked...

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• ME

  Member

  Jan 31, 2009

  Hey Guys/Gals,
  
  Wow, this one is hurting my head.  Anyone want to take a break and meet up for coffee?
  
  Thanks
  j

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• ME

  Member

  Feb 1, 2009

  [quote]Hey Guys/Gals,   Wow, this one is hurting my head.  Anyone want to take a break and meet up for coffee?   Thanks j[/quote]  Sure, I'll pour.  Cream or Sugar? Jen

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