They range from "mild":
- "If nudist resorts don't adapt they will all eventually die."
To outright antagonistic:
- "Every clothing-optional resort I've ever visited was full of voyeurs leering at women" (to which I sarcastically replied: "well maybe you should get out of Florida sometimes." He didn't like that answer!)
- "Single men are not a problem; actually most nudist women I've known have been hit on by married men. Nudist resorts actually suck for women!"
I paraphrase of course but that's the general tone.
Whenever I see posts like the last two, I can't help but think there's some underlying anger about nudist resort culture. Maybe they're single men or married men who know they can't go without their wives. But I feel that spreading disinformation is unhelpful.
Personally, when my first wife and I separated, I knew the nudist resort was going to be "out of reach" for a while. I didn't even bother asking because I don't deal with rejection very well. So instead I decided to relocate. Florida was my first choice; but unable to find a job there, I decided on the Midwest, where I could go to Mazo Beach. As a matter of fact I went there the very first week end after moving. My "return" to the nudist resort scene only happened after I remarried.
I get that it's hard when social nudity seems out of reach because resorts might have quotas or not allow married males. But railing against nudist resorts? There are a lot of good things about the nudist resort. Sure it's a lot better if you have a partner by your side; but one's individual circumstances preventing visiting one does not seem to me to be a good reason to "put them on blast."
Thoughts?
Replies
- FU
FullSunApr 22, 2021Ive seen these threads and posts as well and usually end up feeling a bit confused when reading them. I end up somewhat confused because it has not been my experience rather the opposite. However, I then remind myself that my experience is limited to many visits to Laguna Del Sol, a bit over a week at Cypress Cove, another week at Living Waters (sold and turned textile now), and eight different week to ten day trips to resorts in Jamaica. In other words my experience is pretty limited when it comes to landed resorts in the US. But I know my experiences have been very different from the postings, even so, I would not be surprised to find some places do have environments that can be negative. In the end it boils down to people making generalizations purporting that all resorts are bad instead of a specific subset of them.
ReactReply - J.
J.Apr 22, 2021We have also been mainly to the bigger resorts, at least in the US: Laguna del Sol, Cypress Cove, Lake Como, Sunny Rest, plus our local camps: Solair, Sun Ridge, and Berkshire Vista. We have also been to Abbots Glen b&b in VT which is set up like a small camp. Never had those experiences at any of those places either. Ive only been to one resort alone, Mountain Air Ranch, and still didnt have those experiences. It was on a Monday afternoon after a long cross country flight, so it was not very crowded. Nobody went out of their way to welcome me, but it was a Monday and I only stayed a few hours (way more relaxing after my flight than immediately driving down to Colorado Springs and going to my hotel). I suppose if I was expecting everyone to drop what they were doing to cater to me I would have thought it wasnt an experience that will keep them open for long. 5-6 years later and Im pretty sure MAR is still doing fine.
Social X (and that X isnt limited to nudity) is going to have a lot of couples. Why do you think there are social groups for singles? There are groups for singles in the nudist community, too. There are singles mixers on the nude cruises we go on, and there are singles events occasionally at different nudist resorts. It isnt a weekly thing, so be ready when they do occur. Or stay with the beaches.
ReactReply - MEMemberApr 22, 2021
No one can generalize about nudist resorts. There are all kinds of nudist resorts that cater to a very wide variety of people. There was even an upscale so called nudist resort that was actually a swingers resort. This place was eventually thrown out from AANR.
ReactReply - JO
JohnApr 22, 2021I've also had no issues but also respected the rules/guidelines intended solely to assure comfort of the members (couples and women). That said, its not as much fun going solo unless you know people who are likely to be there.
ReactReply - PA
PaulieApr 22, 2021I can say for me, as a single guy I will avoid AANR clubs. My experience in the USA was as previously described, I was unwelcome, and they didnt try to hide it.
Europe, no one cares.
I live in Canada now and Im happy visiting a few places and minding the rules. I do know that there are a faction of folks there that want to purge all single men from being able to attend, regardless of their behaviour.
Im generally turned off by closed minded behaviour.
Ive found especially at AANR clubs and their member seem to have a naturism is only my way and if you dont like it youll be kicked out mentality. I avoid this.
Ive also been to clubs that have no intention of accepting new members, regardless of gender or marital status.
Naturism as a movement needs to be accepting, otherwise the movement will die and clubs will close.
So, in short, Ill never support AANR or attend any of their clubs.ReactReply - FUFullSunApr 23, 2021
This thread is proving my point that you cant generalize and say that all resorts are bad etc. Obviously from some these post there are some that are restrictive etc. But not all are. Ive been to Laguna Del Sol many times and probably 90-95% of those times Ive gone by myself as my wife does go but its not really her thing and shes usually got a lot going on. Ive never had the slightest problem going by myself. The first several times others that were there were not as open but I did meet people on my first visit and have seen them many times since. As I went more often Ive gotten to know a lot of the regulars and have been invited to pot lucks, an anniversary party, etc. I got to know people on my own and it was great being able to introduce my wife to them when she started going with me some of the time. When Living Waters was open I stayed there by myself fora week while my wife was out of the country and again had no issues and was invited by other guests to go into Palm Springs one evening for dinner and the street fair. So its not AANR or resorts in general, its each individual resort and their policies.
ReactReply - NUnudonyOriginal PosterApr 24, 2021[quote]I don't like to generalize but can share my experiences with three nudist resorts within a three hour drive of Chicago: My overall experience with local resorts has been negative, but I don't want to generalize this globally.[/quote] Interesting! I am actually in the same "neck of the woods"; and more than likely I have been to one or more of the resorts you mentioned. And my experiences there have been overall pretty good. Of course: I was accompanied by my wife. From the moment we walked into the office to check-in we are usually warmly greeted. And contrary to some of the harsh criticism I've read: my wife has never been hit on by any males - married or single, the resorts didn't show any signs of "dying out"; and as far as voyeurism: sure there's "people watching", but it's never been enough to make my wife self-conscious or uncomfortable. I think it's totally reasonable to denounce "anti-single male" culture at resorts (where it exists). But disparaging and generally vilifying all nudist resorts on that basis takes away for the good they actually do for many people. There has always been single males at the nudist resorts I've visited. My wife and I have socialized with many of them. But...you have to correctly set your expectations. Heterocouples do often enjoy a privileged status at nudist resorts (and I have myself railed against this); which is by design: to maintain a balance. But that doesn't make nudist resorts inherently "bad." IMHO.ReactReply
- JO
JohnJun 4, 2021I don't think you would have that kind of problem at Laguna del Sol, Andy. I've been there twice as an unaccompanied male and nobody objected. At the Memorial Day weekend, I would say that the ratio of men to women was about 3:1.
ReactReply - SA
Stone AndyJun 4, 2021[quote]I don't think you would have that kind of problem at Laguna del Sol, Andy. I've been there twice as an unaccompanied male and nobody objected. At the Memorial Day weekend, I would say that the ratio of men to women was about 3:1.[/quote] I'd love to check out Laguna del Sol! As nudism declines in more Puritanical places like the Midwest, it can thrive as a regional niche thing particularly on the coasts. It's unfortunate however that my sons will likely never consider themselves nudists despite our casual relationship with clothes due to how they, along with their single dad, have been discriminated against. They're the ones who'll pay our social security, but not keep the midwestern resorts open, heterocoupled or not.ReactReply - MEMemberJun 9, 2021
We met a friendly chap last weekend at the club as we were golf carting by him as he was walking the grounds. We always stop and welcome folks. There was no getting a word in he never took a breath after he got talking. Certainly not the first time experience but he went on to say he was escorted out of a dance in a nearby club by a woman. I can guess why now!
Could it be a guy sometimes does not know how forward or in the face he is coming off??
ReactReply - SAStone AndyJun 26, 2021[quote]Could it be a guy sometimes does not know how forward or in the face he is coming off??[/quote] I'm sure everyone has come across people who keep talking without a pause for breathing like they might implode any minute, though it's more annoying than offensive. The issue of being forward is another matter as there's a fine line between being straight-forward and disrespectful. For me, respect is not about formalities, but a willingness to look (the root word "spec") at something twice (or "re") from another's perspective. "In the face" is more subjective. Having grown up in an evangelical ethnic enclave, I understand how easy it is for people to be offended by nonnormative behavior. Perhaps one problem with nudist resorts is that nudity is way off the norm, so newcomers may think anything goes and regulars may find it easier to focus on offending types than their behavior. The emphasis may be to screen out the potentially loose cannons and focus on those who understand the path of least resistance as guests of regulars or typically less offensive personality types. I get it that as a middle aged white male, I'm in a group with a lot of offensive personality types, especially those who value their personal "freedom" over respect or consideration for the common good. How can a place be welcoming and still screen out or redirect offensive personalities? How can visitors be mindful and respectful without feeling they're being repressed? I think it's all about respect and it goes both ways. I cannot be respectful, nor can I teach my sons respect, if we are dismissed with unreasonable demands of bringing legal paperwork when making a polite inquiry about visiting. By screening out single men, resorts may have found a relatively simple way to maintain a modicum of respect,. However, in the process they are losing nudists' respect for practicing discrimination.ReactReply
- CH
CharlieJun 26, 2021Well said Mikenshel.
We are all who we are and although the older generation are rather more reserved, in general, there are many who accept others as they are and agree to disagree where appropriate.
What I find annoying are naturists who think everyone else should be like them and effectively try and force their views on others.
We all need to learn respect for other peoples views and be more relaxed about life.
Whoever you are, just make the most of life and smile.ReactReply - TJ
TJJun 28, 2021well I think it's sexist bullshit to have all these rules imposed against men just because. the fact of the matter is that a woman - or a man or a child. or just basically anyone and everyone is probably safer at a nudist joint than anywhere else. aside from the fact that so many nudists are so hell bent on proving that "nudity isn't sex!" that they are basically stuck in perma-prude mode, these places are BUSINESSES that are just not about losing revenue or even being sued for allowing threatening behavior to go on unaddressed. Not to mention that most men at these places are actually decent human beings and would love to get to demonstrate that rather than being. regarded as wild beasts just waiting to pounce and only kept in fragile check by things like these regulations only allowing them in with a supervisory female or whatever. it's like we're wild animals the must be watched by an appropriate number of trainers lest we go rogue at any moment.
it's fucking insulting.
If women feel that inherently fragile and in peril by the mere presence of men then they probably shoukdnt be there at all, period. I dont think thats the case, though. I think they also deserve credit for being smarter and tougher than all that. all this scaredy cat nonsense should be addressed by.emphasizing the safeguards inherently in place and reassuring that things are being monitored. they should also establish. people and places ad points of contact in the event anyone has an issue that is making them feel uneasy or in peril.
the mere presence of males should not in itself qualify as something that should cause such a reaction.
remember love boat? Julie your cruise director? there's no reason why there can't be officially recognized people out
at the pools and such that everybody knows they can immediately go to if something is causing alarm. Nudist men and women coukd also volunteer if they wanted to be "buddies" to not only show people around but be people newbies - especially those fearful women - know are right there that they can turn to if needed.resorts could take just a bit of time to come up with stuff like this, develop protocols for how to handle issues, and then just get the message out first thing to new people and reiterate to established folks the law of the land and that bad behavior will be dealt with swiftly and thoroughly.
do that a hit instead of this numbers game, and stop automatically regarding men to be animals and furthering the notion that nudist clubs are places where danger is always near because if you're honest about it you know nothing could be further from the truth.
focus on behavior - not genitalia
ReactReply - SAStone AndyJul 5, 2021[quote] remember love boat? Julie your cruise director? there's no reason why there can't be officially recognized people out at the pools and such that everybody knows they can immediately go to if something is causing alarm. Nudist men and women coukd also volunteer if they wanted to be "buddies" to not only show people around but be people newbies - especially those fearful women - know are right there that they can turn to if needed. focus on behavior - not genitalia[/quote] Focusing on behavior is basic psychology, so a nude Julie the cruise ship director could be a game changer. I recently was happily surprised to got an invitation through TN for an event at a resort I tried out and found too small cliquish and unfriendly to come back to. Perhaps COVID killed off a lot of their regulars. It's a tough thing for the resorts to turn the ship of their culture around, transitioning from male-hostile to generally unfriendly and dysfunctional. I say give the keys to a small group of Millennials and they'll reinvent resort culture for the better before you can say "okay boomer."ReactReply
- JOJohnJul 5, 2021StoneAndy wrote:[quote] Focusing on behavior is basic psychology, so a nude Julie the cruise ship director could be a game changer. [/quote] When I was at Laguna del Sol on Memorial Day, there was an attendant at the main pool area who was clearly part of the management (possibly a volunteer). She was mainly concerned with people not hogging deck chairs and such, but it seemed obvious that if rules on gawking weren't being followed, she would have been the logical choice to bring a complaint to. I didn't see such a person at the Willamettans community, but it didn't seem necessary since midweek attendance was low. On weekends, there are people working the gift shop, snack bar, and saloon who would presumable be able to field complaints. In both cases, I was an unescorted male. But I should add that my wife is also listed on my TNS membership card, and maybe that helped.ReactReply
- YT
YTJul 7, 2021Since I have always attended as a solo male, I figured I'd share my experiences from a few midwest campgrounds/resorts.
My first resort experience was at a medium sized WI facility and I was quite nervous about the whole thing. I kept to myself and didn't talk to anyone for the first couple hrs and was pleasantly surprised when a few couples and some males started up conversation's with me.Another WI resort I attended a couple times was quite large acreage but was very few people. I think only one or two people talked to me and treated me like a kid even though I was in my mid 40's. Nice site/land but the owners have retired and it is closed now.
The 3rd WI resort I attended (closer to Milwaukee) was a quite nice and very developed place with all manner of facilities. The person checking me in was kind of reserved but once on the grounds I was approached by many for conversation. Men, ladies, couples and the like. All very nice and welcoming. Some even went into history lessons about the resort and the like. Sadly, this resort is now closed as well.
A larger resort I attended in MI was also very developed and quite sizable. Some that I met here were short and kurt so not very welcoming and others were almost too nice. It was easy to tell the regulars from the occasional visitors but most were very nice. Some were a bit protective, of what I still don't know but seemed to be always watching what I was doing. I just went about my business. The employees were nice and helpful with questions I had. I met some very nice people there.
This is also where I was approached by a couple of ladies about extracurricular activities one evening, to which I politely declined and never saw them again during the rest of my stay.The point I am trying to make is that the people you encounter help make or shape your experience. There are some not so good people even at good resorts and vice versa. Some may just be having a bad day for reasons unknown to you. If you come across others not pleasant to be around, separate yourself from them. If they are doing something that is serious enough to warrant the attention of the management or law enforcement then do that too.
FWIW that is my take on it. YMMV.
ReactReply - YTYTSep 8, 2021
I regards to post #28 - "Is this because the majority of resort operators are male & heterosexual ? Just a thought...."
My response is "possibly" but reading into the numbers you posted I would say that it is more likely that unless ladies start showing up in droves they will never be turned away like the men are. There are a lot more men into nudism than women and the numbers you posted support that.
Just my 2 cents.....ReactReply - ST
SteveSep 9, 2021Has anyone ever encountered a nude or clothing-optional resort with too many women? (With the possible exception ofthatscene in Monty Python'sMeaning of Life, that is.ReactReply - FUFullSunSep 9, 2021
One time I was at Laguna Del Sol and there were more women than men at the main pool. It was a nice surprise to see but that was one time.
ReactReply - TD
Tom DSep 9, 2021[quote]Dudes like creepin on women thats why there are so many strip joints. Women dont have that same need.[/quote] But there are plenty of male strip shows, even if they are less common than female strip joints, so there must be a reasonable number of women who want to seen nude or nearly nude men.ReactReply - STSteveSep 9, 2021by FullSun: [quote]One time I was at Laguna Del Sol and there were more women than men at the main pool. It was a nice surprise to see but that was one time.[/quote] Exactly! Nothing but pleasantness in that scenario. I wish females of all ages would see the opposite situation in the same light, but can understand why it may not be so. I'll continue to try to do my bit.ReactReply
- MA
macnudeSep 9, 2021[quote]I regards to post #28 - "Is this because the majority of resort operators are male & heterosexual ? Just a thought...." My response is "possibly" but reading into the numbers you posted I would say that it is more likely that unless ladies start showing up in droves they will never be turned away like the men are. There are a lot more men into nudism than women and the numbers you posted support that. Just my 2 cents.....[/quote] As a long time nudist, I can say with certainty that, "If a resort became overwhelmed with women, the word would get out and the balance would be quickly restored and the resort would prosper."ReactReply - D
DSep 14, 2021i think you are misinformed about what is at the resorts and what you are expecting there to be at a resort. First of all, society tends to be couples oriented. If single or solo men are lurkers and creeps they get along fine with everyone.
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