Would You Meet with Him?

Replies

• ME

  Member

  Jul 25, 2011

  No I would not. I would not meet someone that I did not know anything about or what they looked like or if we had not chatted before meeting.  It would make me uneasy and uncomfortable.  Want to get to know someone first and see what they are all about and looking for.

  ReactReply
• MA

  

  ManOfWicklow

  Jul 25, 2011

  He sound like a jerk, you did the right thing in telling him.

  ReactReply
• CA

  

  catbird

  Jul 25, 2011

  [quote]My opinion?? No way would I meet someone I know nothing about. There is too much evil now days to take that kind of chance. This person could easily been some disturbed individual looking for a next victim. Blasting you after declining is also a red flag.[/quote] I agree that I wouldn't meet with anybody that I know nothing about.

  ReactReply
• NO

  

  None

  Jul 25, 2011

  RED FLAG, RED FLAG, RED FLAG.

  ReactReply
• NU

  

  NudeGuzzi

  Jul 25, 2011

  If his profile offers nothing other than a username and resident city, you are right to question his motives, and if he got pissed over that, then you are double right.

  ReactReply
• DE

  

  DesertRat

  Jul 25, 2011

  Too many red flags here! Although we always want to make new nudist friends, this is not the way to go about it. You need to get all you ducks in a row before meeting someone like this and you certainly have not done a proper vetting process.

  ReactReply
• MA

  

  mallardm45

  Jul 25, 2011

  You chose the right path by not meeting up with this person. i myself never ask to meet anyone in a private setting. The proper way to meet is by telling folks where and when you will be at a place (beach or resort) and if they care to meet up in a public location fine. Also I really would like to chat with someone first and get to know what their intentions are.

  ReactReply
• CO

  

  Curt, or Cowboy

  Jul 25, 2011

  You're in a big town, and there are at least three resorts within driving distance. For you, I'd have recommended one of those. Whether or not I'd have gone there myself would depend on how I felt that day, and that's as far as I'd communicate to someone not known to me, or without a personal recommendation from someone I do know fairly well.. [quote] and I can't believe you'd take a GUN to meet someone!!![/quote]  The only time you'd know, for those that do it right, is if they are completely nude, and their towel is not within reach, or if it was WAY too late.  Generally, the folks that carry, are always carrying, or at least that's the safe assumption. Most police officers, for instance, are carrying, even off duty.

  ReactReply
• ME

  Member

  Jul 26, 2011

  I recently made a business trip to Kansas, I had never been there before, but as I was there for about 3 weeks I decided to search out other nudists to chat with from the area. I messaged several people to ask questions about the area, and after chatting with one, he suggested that we meet and talk. We met at a local resturant, had a great meal, talked, and went our seperate ways, we continue to chat on here, and it was nice to be able to meet a new person without the automatic assumption that something bad was going to happen. It is important to note that I was more comfortable with the meet idea because he was certified, which at least, to some extent provides me with a sense that at least this is the same person as in the profile. I minor level of comfort but better than none at all.
  It is unfortunate that society todays makes us have to distrust first, instead of giving someone a chance.

  ReactReply
• RI

  

  rickinohioOriginal Poster

  Jul 26, 2011

  In his defense, he did not suggest meeting at my place, he suggested a place to get nude or a public place.  I don't have a 9mm to bring with me - not something I would want to do.

  ReactReply
• CO

  

  cocomojoe

  Jul 26, 2011

  You did right. I would never invite anyone to my place that I haven't met and talked to in person first. If he, she, or them has a private profile it tells me they have something to hide or have been hassled by non-nudists. You can always use the flag button. Pivate profiles will be approved on a case-by-case bases.

  ReactReply
• ME

  Member

  Jul 26, 2011

  [quote]I recently made a business trip to Kansas, I had never been there before, but as I was there for about 3 weeks I decided to search out other nudists to chat with from the area. I messaged several people to ask questions about the area, and after chatting with one, he suggested that we meet and talk. We met at a local resturant, had a great meal, talked, and went our seperate ways, we continue to chat on here, and it was nice to be able to meet a new person without the automatic assumption that something bad was going to happen. It is important to note that I was more comfortable with the meet idea because he was certified, which at least, to some extent provides me with a sense that at least this is the same person as in the profile. I minor level of comfort but better than none at all. It is unfortunate that society todays makes us have to distrust first, instead of giving someone a chance.[/quote]  What a great story!

  ReactReply
• GA

  

  gabare

  Jul 26, 2011

  No way , i had someone start chatting with me one night it was like 2 am and we supposedly livesd in the same area and after a short time  wanted to meet up that night. CREEPY !

  ReactReply
• MI

  

  Michael

  Jul 26, 2011

  I think you should have a checklist of things you know about someone before meeting anyone.  For me it's like this:

  1. Communication and Planning: there needs to be some kind of back and forth, and a plan on what we're doing.  If we're meeting, are we having lunch? Are we going to the zoo?  Are we getting a drink after work? What's our plan?  Also, what do you do?  I know a lot of nudists and people in general don't like to talk about their real lives, but we're no longer talking about an online connection, we're trying to be friends at this point.  Tell me what you do whether you're a student or a gardener or a high powered executive.

  2. Some sort of Back-up/Back-out plan.  I'm not a gun toter, but if I was I would definitely be considering at least having it in my car when I went to visit.  I always wear some kind of firm footwear and I always have some kind of bearings about me when I visit someone.  I'm not much of a fighter, but at least I can try to run.  Also, as others mentioned, I'd meet in a public space unless I really felt confident in someone being who they said they were.  If I could I'd also tell someone my plans for the day and keep a phone on me.

  3. A good feeling.  At the end of the day, I trust my intuition and my gut.  If I don't feel good about a meeting whether it's 5 days or 5 minutes before I'm suppose to go... I don't.  If you want to get to know the person better and not straight up be like "I don't feel safe enough yet" then make an excuse.  Get called into work or put grandma in the hospital or something, apologize and say you'd still like to get to know the other person better, but don't go if you have foreboding feelings on things.

  If those things aren't there, I don't go.  When it comes to online interactions especially I just don't go.

  ReactReply
• CO

  

  Curt, or Cowboy

  Jul 26, 2011

  [quote]And there should never be a reason for a civilian to take a gun with them when they're meeting someone.[/quote] I am in absolute 100% agreement ! There *should* not be, ever, and seldom is. [quote] I'm not a gun toter, but if I was I would definitely be considering at least having it in my car when I went to visit.[/quote] That would be dangerous, and almost silly ! Leaving a gun in your car would more likely have you running in a panic, drawing the weapon, still in a paniced state, and harming someone with no justifyable reason whatever. If you make it back to the car, you're already out of danger. If you don't, then it was useless to be there anyway, and you've potentially armed a dangerous individual unintentionally. May I clarify a few things ? An armed civilian at that camp in Norway the other day, could have *potentially* saved 50 or 60 lives. The assailant knowing, or strongly suspecting, an armed and capable civilian at that camp could have potentially saved them all ! You'll note that he attacked known unarmed civilians, not a military encampment. Why might that be ? As it was, he was shooting ducks in a barrel. Reactionary personalities tend to go for the gun when conversation would be more effective. These types should never be carrying any weapons. Bravado gets people killed. Conservative personalities, such as trained military assault teams, tend to show a great deal of restraint. That kind of personality is no danger to anyone of themselves, unless and until the situation calls for it. Ever notice how you never hear of a Black Belt getting into a fight ? There's reason. If ANY of this became at all relevant, avoid the meeting, whatever it takes. If there's even a suspicion of any of this having any relevance, avoid the meeting. Who wants "friends" they can't trust ?

  ReactReply
• RE

  

  renebbare

  Jul 26, 2011

  Carrying a gun for defense is an American way of thinking, I hope there is less gun crime in the rest of the world where we do not go with that rational.
  As for meeting strangers some of us do that daily when we walk into a bar, we are carefull and polite to those we talk to. Meeting another nudist (something I do often as possible) needs a little care and a public place to get to know the other person - Just because we share nudism, we may not like each other.

  ReactReply
• CO

  

  Curt, or Cowboy

  Jul 26, 2011

  [quote]Carrying a gun for defense is an American way of thinking,[/quote] There's something else I ( as an American ) fail to understand.  It only takes about one functional brain cell to realize that a gun is an OFFENSIVE weapon. A shield is defensive. Hiding behind a rock is defensive. Throwing one's arm to block a punch is defensive. Throwing the punch is offensive.

  ReactReply
• SC

  

  Scott

  Sep 1, 2011

  While I have reached out to people I've met on here to see about meeting up as I travel, I have not, nor would I propose a meeting with someone that I had never chatted with, gotten to know, and shared plenty about myself with.  There are just way too many flakey people out there, and if I were in your position, I'd be very wary about him.......

  ReactReply
• ST

  

  Steve

  Sep 1, 2011

  No, because of how little information is in the profile.  Not with a zillion prior contacts.  My own profile is pretty informative - what I look like, where I live, what I do for a living, and my first name. I have no reason to seek anonymity.  And I simply don't have time for people who try to live split lives, with an internet presence / nudist identity / whatever divorced somehow from their 'real' life.  Someone with an upfront, open internet identity is likely to be a safer contact, and a more interesting person.  That said, I don't meet anyone - from this site or farm-volunteer sites or any other online venue - without prior TELEPHONE contact.  Amazing how the suggestion of a phone call will make some potential contacts just evaporate.  Maintaining an unreal persona at the keyboard is one thing; doing it in voice is something very, very different.

  ReactReply
• CH

  

  Chris

  Sep 2, 2011

  sounds like you did the right thing.  no way would I invite someone into my home if I didn't know a little more about them.  way too many whack-jobs

  ReactReply
• GR

  

  Grant

  Mar 6, 2012

  Your right, certainly not. This situation wouldn't make me fell good. If it was a meeting like a nudist beach or resort , ok not private.
  

  ReactReply
• TI

  

  Timo2009

  Mar 19, 2012

  Hey Jabbari,I'm old, but I've never asked you for a free place to stay. Just kidding!  I've met some people from this site, in person, and the rule is always to meet in a very public clothed place for the first meeting. As a matter of fact I have a good friend here on this site, that I've met in person many times and we've never met nude! Tim

  ReactReply
• WE

  

  westheathen

  Mar 25, 2012

  Bump to take out the trash.
  

  ReactReply
• ME

  Member

  Apr 20, 2012

  I think you did the right thing...go with your gut. I recently did. Long story short...I made a "friend" on this site and we began communicating via messages here frequently, then after a couple of weeks decided that a meeting in public (clothed) would be nice. When it came time to meet, he became overly anxious to meet..very eager. Turns out, he had an emergency at work which delayed the time we would meet that day. I sensed something was afoot and feared that the public meeting would happen too late at night. Anyway, I offered to reschedule to allow for a more relaxed meeting. He became relentless. For two days after, he continued to contact me to let me know how hard it is to find someone to "hang out with naked". He was on the road for work and wanted to maintain contact...which turned weird. He started out by talking about ground rules for our relationship (no intercourse ?!?....specifying body parts, hugs were ok...) I felt more than extremely uncomfortable and stopped communicating. The morale of the story is trust your gut....meet in public. And if he responds with understanding to your trepidation, chances are you're on the right track.

  ReactReply