More Animal Jokes

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• MA

  

  ManOfWicklowOriginal Poster

  Aug 16, 2018

  [em]A farmer wanted to have his hens serviced, so he went to the market looking for a rooster. He was hoping he could get a special rooster - one that would service all of his many hens. When he told this to the market vendor, the vendor replied, "I have just the rooster for you. Henry here is the horniest rooster you will ever see!" So the farmer took Henry back to the farm. Before setting him loose in the hen house though, he gave Henry a little pep talk. "Henry", he said, "I'm counting on you to do your stuff." And without a word, Henry then strutted into the hen house. Henry was as fast as he was furious, mounting each hen like a thunderbolt. There was much squawking and many feathers flying, till Henry had finished having his way with each hen. But Henry didn't stop there, he went in to the barn and mounted all the horses, one by one and still at the same frantic pace. Then he went to the pig house where he did the same. The farmer, watching all of this with disbelief, cried out, "Stop, Henry, you'll kill yourself." But Henry continued, seeking out each farm animal in the same manner. Well the next morning, the farmer looked out and saw Henry lying there on his lawn. His legs were up in the air, his eyes rolled back, and his long tongue hanging out. A buzzard was already circling above Henry. The farmer walked up to Henry saying, "Oh you poor thing, look what you did, you've gone and killed yourself. I warned you big buddy." "Shhhhh," Henry whispered, "The buzzard is getting closer."
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• T=

  

  Tom === Thomas S. Tierney

  Aug 16, 2018

  Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"
  Man: "Yes!"
  Reporter: "Name?"
  Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."
  Reporter: "Sex?"
  Man: "Three to five times a week."
  Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"
  Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."
  Reporter: "Holy cow!"
  Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."
  Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"
  Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."
  Reporter: "Oh dear!"
  Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

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• MA

  

  ManOfWicklowOriginal Poster

  Apr 13, 2022

  [quote]Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?" Man: "Yes!" Reporter: "Name?" Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim." Reporter: "Sex?" Man: "Three to five times a week." Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?" Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel." Reporter: "Holy cow!" Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general." Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?" Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style." Reporter: "Oh dear!" Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."[/quote]

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• JO

  

  John

  Apr 15, 2022

  "Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."

  Groucho Marx

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• MA

  

  ManOfWicklowOriginal Poster

  May 27, 2022

  [quote]Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?" Man: "Yes!" Reporter: "Name?" Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim." Reporter: "Sex?" Man: "Three to five times a week." Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?" Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel." Reporter: "Holy cow!" Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general." Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?" Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style." Reporter: "Oh dear!" Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."[/quote]

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