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Tom === Thomas S. Tierney

Humor and Fun

Add A Limerick.

Posted Dec 12, 2012

Replies167
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Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
Tom === Thomas S. TierneyOriginal Poster
Dec 12, 2012
A man with an erection?
Now that I have your attention.
An erotically named thread
Is most often read.
But, to solicit rhymes or limericks is my intention.

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  • T=
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Tom === Thomas S. TierneyOriginal Poster
    Dec 26, 2012
    There once was a young man from Nr Tamworth,
    Who out into the cold weather did venture forth.
    To do that naked he had to be very bold.
    But, he soon discovered it was far too cold.
    To be frolicking naked outside that far north.


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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklow
    Dec 26, 2012
    In Vienna I stopped for some strudell,
    It's crust was as limp as a noodle,
    We waited an hour,
    The filling was sour,
    And the pie wasn't fit for a poodle.

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  • T=
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Tom === Thomas S. TierneyOriginal Poster
    Dec 26, 2012
    A fellow was rushed to the doc,
    After getting shot up with a Glock.
    The surgeon, quite nice,
    Gave the guy sage advice:
    "Wives in swimsuits are best not to mock."

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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklow
    Dec 27, 2012

    [img src="http://rlv.zcache.com/black_widow_spider_limerick_magnet-d1470287984533634278gm5_500.jpg">

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  • T=
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Tom === Thomas S. TierneyOriginal Poster
    Dec 27, 2012
    A salty young gal is enraged
    When she learns that her date is engaged,
    So she curses the fellow
    Spews hate with a bellow,
    Then shoots. Guess her anger ain't staged.

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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklow
    Dec 28, 2012
    There once was a man who like to drive,
    Exceedingly fast along highway five,
    When out of town,
    His foot went down,
    And then that engine would come alive.

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  • T=
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Tom === Thomas S. TierneyOriginal Poster
    Dec 28, 2012
    There once was a man who drove nude,
    When he went shopping for fast food.
    At the pick up window of KFC,
    His naked body all could see.
    He went out of his way to be viewed.

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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklow
    Dec 29, 2012
    There was a young lady from Maine,
    Who was in considerable pain,
    She fell off her seat,
    Onto the dogs feet,
    And he bit her again and again.
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  • T=
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Tom === Thomas S. TierneyOriginal Poster
    Dec 29, 2012
    There was a young lady from Maine,
    With many men she had lain.
    She should have fellated,
    All of the men she dated,
    Childbirth did cause her much pain.

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  • T=
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Tom === Thomas S. TierneyOriginal Poster
    Jan 1, 2013
    Rose are red, violets are blue,
    Wishing a Happy New Year to you.

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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklow
    Jan 1, 2013
    Roses are red violets are blue,
    Too much to eat and to drink too,
    Had whiskey galore,
    And still having more,
    To toast the New Year to you.

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  • T=
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Tom === Thomas S. TierneyOriginal Poster
    Jan 1, 2013
    If there's one thing I cannot abide,
    It is people who cannot decide
    What to eat, where to go,
    Hot or cold, fast or slow.
    Do you think I should take it in stride?

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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklow
    Jan 2, 2013
    Sometimes I really do not Know,
    If I should come or I should go,
    Up I go,
    Down I go,
    It's no fun to be a yo yo.
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  • T=
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Tom === Thomas S. TierneyOriginal Poster
    Jan 3, 2013
    I was making a 2013 list
    of items I'd try to resist
    in the upcoming year.
    But I lost it, I fear:
    Both the list and my will to desist.


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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklow
    Jan 4, 2013
    A frustrated young man named Jake,
    Met up with a girl on the make,
    She took all he had,
    It made him so mad,
    He drowned her down in the lake.
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  • T=
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Tom === Thomas S. TierneyOriginal Poster
    Jan 5, 2013
    One day without thinkin, I said to the wife,
    So your bum is on the big side,
    I don't mind a bit of flab.
    It means that when I'm ready,
    there's somethin' there to grab.
    I'll be carrying the scars for the rest of my life.

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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklow
    Jan 6, 2013
    Apple orange pear or lime,
    Limerick and also rhyme,
    I see before you went to bed,
    You decided to change the thread,
    Now with this rearranged,
    The Title should be changed.
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  • T=
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Tom === Thomas S. TierneyOriginal Poster
    Jan 7, 2013
    One day without thinkin', I said to the wife,
    "So your belly isn't flat anymore, I tell you, I don't care.
    so long as when we cuddle, I can get my arms round you there."
    I'll be carrying the scars for the rest of my life


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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklow
    Jan 8, 2013
    Rhymes and limericks I try to write,
    Throughout the day to get them right,
    Maybe I could
    Make them good,
    By staying awake all through the night.



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  • T=
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Tom === Thomas S. TierneyOriginal Poster
    Jan 8, 2013
    Rhymes and limericks you did write,
    And posted them in full sight.
    I didn't know you could
    Write one that good,
    I'll try to match it later tonight.

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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklow
    Jan 9, 2013
    What happened to your nightly rhyme,
    I think you've had sufficient time,
    So would you please,
    Just hit the keys,
    Then you can write some rhyme like mine.
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  • T=
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Tom === Thomas S. TierneyOriginal Poster
    Jan 10, 2013
    2012 left my old body abused,
    cholesterol-ridden and well boozed.
    I can't invent evolutions
    of new resolutions.
    I'll use last years, still wrapped and un-used!


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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklow
    Jan 10, 2013
    So late arising from my bed,
    Cannot find my thinking head,
    This silly old mind
    lost track of time,
    And this last line does not rhyme.
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  • T=
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Tom === Thomas S. TierneyOriginal Poster
    Jan 10, 2013
    The sign on the door was in blue:
    Shoes and shirts, or we cannot serve you.
    But that waitress looked pissed
    So I'm thinkin' that list
    Maybe shoulda had pants on it, too
    .
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