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ManOfWicklow

Humor and Fun

Wise Words of the Day

Posted Aug 18, 2011

Replies126
MA
ManOfWicklow
ManOfWicklowOriginal Poster
Aug 18, 2011

Man who knows how to really enjoy life, has lots of wives, but never gets married.

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Replies

  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklowOriginal Poster
    Apr 17, 2012
    Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself -Leo Tolstoy.
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  • MI
    Mitch
    Mitch
    Apr 22, 2012
    Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.

    Yeah, an oldie but a goodie!
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  • T=
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Apr 22, 2012
    A secret is something you tell to only one person at a time.
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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklowOriginal Poster
    Apr 22, 2012

    There's a big difference between good sound reasons, and reasons that sound good.

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  • T=
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Apr 22, 2012
    Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with
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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklowOriginal Poster
    Apr 22, 2012
    [quote]Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with
    [/quote]And, never poker, when her husband is there.
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  • BO
    Bob
    Bob
    Apr 26, 2012
    Let me start off with my definition of "funny": Some else's pain, shame or misfortune. The more aware you are of it the funnier it is.

    About 15 years ago a co-worker told me his most awkward moment was when his girlfriend handed him a pair of tweezers and a flashlight. He asked her what were they were for. She told him she lost the string on her tampon and wanted him to get it out of her.

    Bob

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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklowOriginal Poster
    May 4, 2012

    I think you should have posted that on one of the joke threads, Bob.

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  • T=
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Jun 4, 2012
    Squirrels, natures little speed bumps.

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  • T=
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Jun 6, 2012
    I don't think animal testing is a good idea;
    they get all nervous and give the wrong answers.
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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklowOriginal Poster
    Jun 6, 2012
    [quote]I don't think animal testing is a good idea;
    they get all nervous and give the wrong answers.[/quote]Just like blondes, then.
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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklowOriginal Poster
    Jul 1, 2012
    The secret to success is knowing who to blame for your failures.
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  • T=
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Jul 1, 2012
    He who smiles in a crisis has found someone to blame
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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklowOriginal Poster
    Jul 1, 2012



    A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car
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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklowOriginal Poster
    Jul 2, 2012
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.
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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklowOriginal Poster
    Jul 3, 2012
    Being British is about driving a German car to an Irish pub for a Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV.
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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklowOriginal Poster
    Jul 27, 2012
    A pessimist is a person who has had to listen to too many optimists.
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  • T=
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Tom === Thomas S. Tierney
    Jul 27, 2012
    An optimist says the glass is half full... a pessimist says the glass is half empty.
    I don't care if its half empty or half full. I wanna know, "Are there free refills?"
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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklowOriginal Poster
    Jul 28, 2012

    Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklowOriginal Poster
    Aug 2, 2012
    A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing.
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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklowOriginal Poster
    Aug 6, 2012

    Being defeated is often a temporary condition, giving up is what makes it permanent.

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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklowOriginal Poster
    Oct 22, 2012

    [img src="http://www.level8000.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/394.jpg">

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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklowOriginal Poster
    Oct 22, 2012
    A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.
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  • MA
    ManOfWicklow
    ManOfWicklowOriginal Poster
    Oct 28, 2012
    Too many people spend money they haven't earned, to buy things they don't want, to impress people they don't like.
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