Separating social nudity from sexual nudity

Replies

• MA

  

  Marcus

  Aug 7, 2023

  Thank you for your description. Nudism is not about SEEING or being SEEN. Its about BEING nude. The question is when does exhibtionism or voyeurism start?

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• SA

  

  Stone Andy

  Aug 7, 2023

  Your description sounds well-grounded and appropriate. I can't however separate sexual energy from everyday activities, naked or clothed. When I add spices to my soup or salad dressing, it's a creative activity that comes from the same energy as my sexuality. In the same way I feel my sexual energy is affirmed when I am being looked at as attractive, both clothed or naked. Separating social nudity from sexual nudity is for me about the same as separating social clothing from sexual clothing. It's not the nudity or clothes that make us sexual, it's our energy. There's a difference between sexual behavior and sexually inspired behavior, but the energy is what matters.

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• NU

  

  nudony

  Aug 9, 2023

  The proclamation that "Nudism is not about SEEING or being SEEN" is debatable IMHO.

  Because I don't think we can dismiss the visual element in social nudity. For example when my wife sees that everyone is nude at the resort, she feels more comfortable with people seeing her naked as well. It's enjoyable to see our friends displaying confidence in their nudity - and they feeling the same way about me. It's about acceptance and appreciation more than "titillation."

  I think for that idea to be more sensible you have to add "Nudism is not about SEEING or being SEEN - sexually." Because then it becomes something else that might not be about nudism.

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• SA

  

  Stone Andy

  Sep 20, 2023

  [quote]The proclamation that "Nudism is not about SEEING or being SEEN" is debatable IMHO. Because I don't think we can dismiss the visual element in social nudity.[/quote] This is one of those hypocritical aspects of old school Puritanical US nudism. Of course people are seeing and being seen. It's part of the energy of social nudism, similar to the light erotic charge of having the sun and wind on all your skin including your genitals. To deny that is to deny being human. It's not a matter of seeing or being seen, but instead to interact with respect towards others. Watch where your mind takes you. What's a four letter word for intercourse ending in "k"? How about talk? It's legitimate, and it's healthy social intercourse. You can be respectful naked. And you can be a respectful naked sexual human. It's not the what but the how. Look closer at the word respect. Re=again. Spect=to view (as in spectacle, spectators). Respect=to look at twice, once with your eyes, another time with the other person's eyes.

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• ME

  Member

  Sep 20, 2023

  Sexual thoughts, urges and activities are triggered by our neurological and glandular human functions. We were built this way. However, nudism is a choice. We may come to it in different ways, but I believe all of us feel exhilaration, self fulfillment and comradship. If our sexuality manifests itself during social nudity it's most likely to be our biology. Act as a lady or gentleman and all will be well with most fellow nudists.

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• FA

  

  Fabienne

  Sep 21, 2023

  I've learned we all are just sexual beings per se. So you can't switch sexuality off. But we can behave polite and adequate, depending on the social situation.

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• ST

  

  Steve

  Sep 21, 2023

  We host farm volunteers for periods from a week to a month, and let them know we're casual about nudity. Only the occasional visitor is really comfortable being naked. I used to be gradual about resuming my usual in-home nudity with such visitors around. But I've found, like the OP with his housemates, that the best thing is just to keep on with my regular habits, which fairly quickly lets the visitors understand that my nudity is, in no sense, about them, it's just me living my life. Does this mean I'm being "non-sexual"? Not at all. I'm a sexual being, drawing energy, ebbing and flowing, continually from my sexuality. My sexuality puts a spark in my eye showing my receipt to the tiny old woman checking my receipt at Walmart's door or walking past the farmworker stopping his weedwacker as I pass. But I do not, in the course of living as a sexual being, engage genitally with everyone I meet. No one does. To say that nudity is non-sexual just means that one is naked in a context where the nudityitselfis not meant or seen as a particular signal of sexual arousal, assertion, or availability. And the simplest, most reassuring way to manifest that is to follow the conventional definition of social nudity - to act, when naked, more or less as one would when clothed.

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• ME

  Member

  Sep 21, 2023

  [quote] However, nudism is a choice. [/quote] Are you sure about that? I was "built" that way, born nude. I would say that putting something on is the choice. All the more reason nudity should be accepted by all humans. But as per the subject of this thread, sexual acts are a personal matter and should be kept personal. On the other hand, simple reminders that we are living sexual beings (like an erection) should not shock a fellow human being, especially ones that are used to seeing the natural human body.

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• SA

  

  Stone Andy

  Sep 22, 2023

  [quote]Whats wrong with sexual nudity anyway? Why does it have to be separate?[/quote] Sexuality needs to be separate from nudity because it might make us happy, God perish the thought. H. L. Mencken put is succinctly about a century ago and for some time has stod still. Puritanism: the haunting fear that somebody, somewhere might be happy.

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• JI

  

  Jim

  Sep 22, 2023

  [quote]Anyone else getting bored with old-school nudism and the recurring, ridiculous protestations of nudist asexuality? Whats wrong with sexual nudity anyway? Why does it have to be separate? We are sexual beings. Our sexuality isnt contained in our clothing, so it isnt removed when we remove our clothing. Its 2023 guys - sexuality has been emancipated. Get over it.[/quote] Short answer is, nothing if that's what the group norms are. But if they are the opposite then my view is either we respect them or don't participate in that environment or setting. Seems to me that is a reasonable idea both practically and ethically and gets the results that satisfy the most amount of people... no? Fighting against what's clearly a deeply held and inflexible stance that's important to someone else just ends up with the person fighting it miserable and angry with a bunch of pissed off people who have unjustifiably bad opinions of him. I respect their position without having to agree with it and as a result don't impose myself in their environment or show up at their gatherings. In the few instances where I have had to appear on business and community relations invitations I follow the rules established with exemplary attention. In reciprocal instances I have removed members from the organizations I was involved with when anonymous privileges had been extended to individuals who were part of strictly naturist organizations as well.

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• JI

  

  Jim

  Sep 22, 2023

  [quote]We host farm volunteers for periods from a week to a month, and let them know we're casual about nudity. Only the occasional visitor is really comfortable being naked. I used to be gradual about resuming my usual in-home nudity with such visitors around. But I've found, like the OP with his housemates, that the best thing is just to keep on with my regular habits, which fairly quickly lets the visitors understand that my nudity is, in no sense, about them, it's just me living my life. Does this mean I'm being "non-sexual"? Not at all. I'm a sexual being, drawing energy, ebbing and flowing, continually from my sexuality. My sexuality puts a spark in my eye showing my receipt to the tiny old woman checking my receipt at Walmart's door or walking past the farmworker stopping his weedwacker as I pass. But I do not, in the course of living as a sexual being, engage genitally with everyone I meet. No one does. To say that nudity is non-sexual just means that one is naked in a context where the nudity itself is not meant or seen as a particular signal of sexual arousal, assertion, or availability. And the simplest, most reassuring way to manifest that is to follow the conventional definition of social nudity - to act, when naked, more or less as one would when clothed.[/quote] I think the problem is in that last sentence. Clothing and textile culture along with the objectification it produces and circulates results in a whole range of social behaviors and effects that are not holistic, intersubjective or nuanced. This is obviously not the case for you and having read your comments and regarded the wisdom therein I feel very certain about this evaluation but... the vast majority of us are still in process out of that space of distortion and repression and not yet at a place where unclothed conduct can or should mirror clothed conduct... in essence the excesses of one are mirrored in the repressions of the other. But... unpacking the idea "conventions of social nudity" is also for me the answer and solution to the dilemma. What is the social setting? Who is included or excluded? What are the rules either implied or explicit and what is our individual responsibility to them for everyone's sake? And careful attention to the self and others with humility humour charity and grace always for me are the best way forward. So I agree just getting long winded and detailed if anyone cares to read or needs the extras. Thank you for being you, as always.

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• ST

  

  StevieLorna

  Sep 22, 2023

  [quote]Anyone else getting bored with old-school nudism and the recurring, ridiculous protestations of nudist asexuality?[/quote]
  
  What makes you think naturists are asexual?
  
  Thats not a way Id describe me or any of our naturist friends.
  
  Definition.
  Asexual A term used to describe someone who does not experience sexual attraction toward individuals of any gender
  
  Is it because no one is sexually attracted to you, so you assume it the same for everyone?

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• EA

  

  EarlD

  Sep 22, 2023

  [quote]Anyone else getting bored with old-school nudism and the recurring, ridiculous protestations of nudist asexuality? What makes you think naturists are asexual? Thats not a way to Id describe me or any of our naturist friends. Definition. Asexual A term used to describe someone who does not experience sexual attraction toward individuals of any gender Is it because no one is sexually attracted to you, so you assume it the same for everyone?[/quote] Because that is how he and others like him try to justify and find cover for their libertine behavior while destroying the a way of life that predates them.

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• EA

  

  EarlD

  Dec 15, 2023

  [quote]I've learned we all are just sexual beings per se. So you can't switch sexuality off. But we can behave polite and adequate, depending on the social situation.[/quote] This is the heart of the issue. It feels like some people want to behave in a sexual manner when it comes to nudity regardless of the context. In "polite" society it is understood that every behavior is not appropriate in every context. I think that applies to behavior while nude. It strikes me as odd that some can't seem to apply that rubric to nudism and naturism. Instead they insist in promoting the idea that non sexual nudity is prudish. That is nothing but a myth meant to diminish the opposing perspective.

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• ME

  Member

  Dec 26, 2023

  This is excellent post about proper etiquette for being a nudist around others who may not be or are curious about it. Not everyone developes this. It took years for me to not get aroused when nude. It takes a lot of arousal focused attention to be hard in perticular settings cause of it but I consider it an evan trade off so that I am not making others in my company uncomfortable..

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• BI

  

  Bill

  Jan 3, 2024

  Being all alone and bare, like what is being described in the quote below - with the ability to freely let the mind and body go wherever they care to - is a solo pleasure where a ripe fantasy can take over without any issues. But when one is involved in a nude social situation and allow such ideas to manifest and take hold can be quite problematic. Simply feeling the sun and breeze on the whole body can and does bring up certain male parts for a man who's new to nudism or for the uninitiated, and that can quickly escalate to when someone on staff at the resort will have to confront the fresh-to-being-bare visitor, without some immediate intervention like a towel tossed across the crotch or a turn onto the belly. Living and working at a nude resort for a while does afford me some insight into how often this sort of thing happens. Thankfully, it is quite rare, though not rare enough. You can find plenty here in True Nudists who suggest that there's nothing wrong with letting the dong show freely when it's flying high. Those who encourage this neglectful attitude have never had to warn a person to stop staring at someone across the pool area, to ask them to cover themselves as their penis is freely oozing, even with their hand absentmindedly stroking, having let their thoughts of sexual intrigue take over any common sense. In extreme situations, having to escort the person to the gate because he cannot help himself, that walk of shame is something no one wishes on another. Confrontation of this kind is required if the resort is to maintain a reputation of wholesomeness and comfort for all. To say that a seasoned nudist will always be able to control all sexual thoughts is not fair, and does not take into account the level of stimulation involved, much less all the variables at hand, things like how long it has been since any activity, the phase of the moon, etc. How the persondealswith those thoughts and reactions is what matters inside the gates of a family nudist community. The difference between those of us who can in short order unplug our bodily reactions from such thoughts, versus those who cannot, is mostly due to the nakedness becoming so commonplace that everyone around you being undressed gets to be very unremarkable. [quote]This is a good discussion. I have not yet been socially nude yet, and I wonder about this. I get a bit of a thrill just being alone nude in my yard where nobody can see me. So I really wonder how it will be in front of others with my girlfriend when we go to a resort. Sexual thoughts are unavoidable. I'm a man, they happen all the time, clothed or not. I guess I'm normal.[/quote]

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• ME

  Member

  Jan 4, 2024

  This is a really great post/topic and here is a womans point of view (which one of the posters asked for). Im a late nudist bloomer. I didnt come into this lifestyle until I was about 48. And I dont go nude all the time like I prefer to, but I very much enjoy being nude. So up until I was introduced to the nudist lifestyle, I always associated nudity to sex. Thats just how I was brought up. After meeting other nudists and learning more about the lifestyle, I have learned that being nude is not always associated with sexuality. I do know that there are some people who participate in social nudity and sex is involved. I have a nudist friend who has been to places like that (they did not know the place was like that until they went there). Anyway, to each their own. I am private with my sexuality. To me, sex is special and shared with your partner in private. I now understand that being a nudist and being nude in social situations is different from being nude and having sex. Most of my nude time is at home and in my backyard. And yes, I do get a bit of an arousal when Im nude at home (which Im always alone when nude at home). I love the feeling of the air and sun on my body. I have been to a nudist resort around other people and have NOT been aroused. For me, being around other nudists and my conversations with other nudists was no different than being around textiles. I never felt uncomfortable or awkward. People at this resort were welcoming and friendly. I think there are some people who want to make it known that nudity does not always have to be associated with sex, especially the nudist who would like nudity to be normalized.

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• 2B

  

  2bnude4me

  Jan 4, 2024

  I to find a big difference between social nudity and sexual nudity. I have enjoyed being nude most of my life, I like the feeling of the sun and breeze on my skin, and just being nude is for me expressive, a little rebellious too. Social nudity connects you to others in an intimate way that is quite special, but in no way sexual at all, but maybe a little primal. Social nudity is freedom to be your very basic self in a "garden of Eden" setting. Sexual nudity has it's place, but not in social nudity.

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• ME

  Member

  Jan 4, 2024

  It's not about what we're thinking or feeling it's about the way we behave (act) is the difference.
  When nude and in a social setting don't do or say anything that you wouldn't if you were clothed. We all have different barriers in this regard so the emphasis here is reading the room and acting in accordance with the group setting

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• PH

  

  Philip

  Jan 4, 2024

  I have had no difficulty separating social nudity from sexual issues. A topic has been explored about getting erect and the production of precum, but I haven't had experience with either in simple nudist situations. To get erect for me requires sexual stimulation that doesn't occur from simple nude encounters in nudist situations.

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• BI

  

  Bill

  Jan 4, 2024

  There's no such thing as too much -- until, of course, there's chafing or rug burns... ; ) [quote]I think this is about nudity in front of others... and as for sexuality, of course all people have sex, maybe I have too much, heh, heh.[/quote]

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• PA

  

  Please ask

  Jan 5, 2024

  This seems to be an excellent and balanced discussion - and a very important one. In Western society, especially in the US, there is a (too) close a connection between nudity and sex. The commercial arena and the notion that "sex sells" undermine the fact that social nudity and sexual nudity CAN be separated (the subject here). Of course, we are sexual beings whether nude or textiled. The question articulated very well by a few here is how we behave and respect the environment where we are at a given point. If we are in a swingers' club (not my thing) and sexual nudity is the norm for that situation, people are expected to behave in one way. If we are in a social nudist setting, especially a family setting, we behave very differently. If I am in the woods alone or with accepting friends, I will be naked (weather permitting). When I am at the supermarket, I will be clothed. Context matters.

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• TD

  

  Tom D

  Jan 5, 2024

  [quote]When I am at the supermarket, I will be clothed. Context matters.[/quote] Plus, most supermarkets are too cool for comfortable nudity!

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• ST

  

  StevieLorna

  Jan 5, 2024

  Some anthropologists would say supermarkets are why humans started to wear clothes.

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