'Jewelry' at resorts and beaches

Replies

• NA

  

  NakedBadger

  Oct 15, 2019

  I dunno. I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who has been generally felt pretty well accepted as a single guy for who I am, and it's been OK. Sometimes I've had another guy come on to me (note that it's "a guy") and it's led to consequences more often for worse than for better (sorry, whoever you are: but that in itself says something, eh?). But I've generally not had a problem as a single male being received, even with my tattoo and my metal jewelry, quite well as who I am. Like I say, I guess I'm lucky.

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• KE

  

  Kevin

  Oct 15, 2019

  Regarding the comments about single men not being excluded or treated differently, here's a post from another thread:
  
  

  [strong][em]Post #6
  StevieLorna
  Super Nudist
  RE:MALE NUDISTS
  To all the lone men, would you sit down next to a dressed couple in the park and expect to be treated like an old friend just because you are all wearing clothes?
  
  They would probably think you a weirdo.
  
  So why do you expect the reaction to be different on a nude beach?[/em][/strong]

  
  
  The tone in this post (from an entirely different thread) is that I shouldn't expect to be spoken to as a single man in a clothed situation so why should I expect to be spoken to in a nudist situation? I'm not sure how people treat one another in Lanarkshire GB, but usually in the US when someone would sit down in proximity to someone else in a park there would be a common courtesy of saying "Hello" and "How are you?" without being thought of as weird or there being any sexual overtones to it - to us it's being polite.
  
  -The only landed club close to me has a non-discrimination clause however a club employee has informed me that background checks are run on single men only.
  - The only active non-landed club will allow any women and mixed couples into the group but will not allow single men or married gay couples into the group unless they have a a matching number of women; this is discriminatory against men and predominately against single men.
  
  I've attached 3 screen captures from the first 3 couple profiles that had any entries in their profile, and all 3 state specifically that there is to be no contact from single men. That's the first three couples all stating no contact from single men, so laugh all you want but if someone doesn't understand that nudists as a whole are segmenting themselves based on marital status and gender then I don't think that they are being very honest...
  
  And no worries, I pass a background check with flying colors :])

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• ST

  

  StevieLorna

  Oct 16, 2019

  Kevin, you have reposted my comment from another thread ( where it had context.) and misinterpreted it for your own ends.

  Nowhere in that short post are sexual overtones mentioned or even hinted at. Nowhere does it suggest we are ever impolite to anyone, dressed or nude.

  Expect to be treated like an old friend... those were the words. Not a polite hello.

  We have no problems with singles of either sex.. We only ever meet people while on holiday at naturist resorts (not clubs) where singles are in the minority and we treat everyone the same, regardless.

  We only have problems when people act in an inappropriate manner, that includes textiles.

  You mentioned honesty. We have trouble believing the guys who decorate their cocks and say its jusy jewellery and they arent doing it for a sexual thrill or to draw attention to their genitals.
  We believe they, are not being honest.

  Re-read this entire thread, pay attention to my comment about our experience of those who wear cock rings. Check the profiles of every pro cock ringers. Come back and tell me how many times Ive been wrong.

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• KE

  

  Kevin

  Oct 17, 2019

  I did read the entire thread and think that the usage of the comments made on that thread were an adequate response to post #144, about how single men always feel that they are not reviewed as genuine by others on this site.

  I do stand by using the quote from another thread because it validates the tone and sentiment on this thread: I am perfectly fine with someone not understanding a person's preference for piercing (and other personal preferences), I just don't think that calls for some of the innuendo or name-calling that's taken place here. If you don't like something that's fine but there's no need to call people who do idiots, narcissists, liars, creeps, freaks, and perverts - verbiage that's been used in this thread. The post from the previous thread shows an inability to have a serious discussion and calls out the character of many who have a difference of opinion and need to state such by making personal assaults.

  I also think the remainder of my post answers the question made on post #144, regardless of the use of the quote.

  I personally would urge anyone on this thread to read the other one as well as it gives a fair insight to the way a great many members on this site regards anyone who's different or has varying beliefs. Do I agree with all men on that thread? No, but I would simply state that I disagree and yet not resort to the attacks of personal character that I saw on that thread and on this thread by so many.

  If I see something sexual in a photo here, I report it. If someone reaches out to me in a purely sexual manner I block them. If there are sexual comments on one of my photos I remove them. I have no erection pictures and think that those that post them are not nudists, nor are the women with no profiles racking up friends due to their sexually explicit photos. But one thing I won't do is not show respect to people who are expressing opinions that may very from my own, and having a piercing, tattoo, cock ring, green hair, shaved genitals, breast implants, or purple eye-shadow should never warrant people pointing at or being verbally abusive to that person because in the end none of those things impacts any other nudist in any way. If the guy with the cock ring sits next to you and your wife, you can remove yourself from personal interaction without being nasty. If the girl with the green hair who's decided not to shave any of her body walks on the beach, that doesn't mean that anybody has the right to point and laugh just because people may incorrectly assume that she's done so merely for attention.

  This thread is a window into what's wrong with the world and organized nudism, a complete lack of sensitivity and common courtesy; with the exception of a few quality people on the thread who said "don't like it and don't understand it but to each their own" I appreciate the candor and grace with which that message was delivered. To all others on this thread (pro and con) I'd suggest they re-read this thread, visit the great cock-ring debate, and then question just how much judgment and acceptance there is in the nudist community and just how cruel we in this lifestyle can be...

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• ST

  

  StevieLorna

  Oct 17, 2019

  Kevin, your piercings, tattoos and cockrings are your business, no one is saying you shouldnt have them or wear them, if someone was I would defend your right to do and wear what you like. ( if you were a textile who would even know)

  If I was to wear donkey ears then I hope I could count on you to defend my right to look like an ass. Even if I was to proclaim I was only wearing them because they feel nice and Im in no way trying to draw attention to my head.

  You might think, along with others that my donkey ears looked ridiculous.

  If I was to start a thread on here asking who else likes looking like an ass.

  As you think they look ridiculous and you know many of my peers think the same way, then you might feel the need to point out that I really do look an ass just to save me making a complete ass of myself. I might even thank you for it.

  I doubt this is ever likely to happen as I have a partner who would tell me to take them off before anyone notices how fkn idiotic I looked.

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• KE

  

  Kevin

  Oct 18, 2019

  Now, regarding single men...
  
  I think that gender-imbalance does exist because 1) women are less likely to participate or feel more uncomfortable with the lifestyle and 2) in general organized nudism strives for the balance of gender equity in most cases and as such it discriminates against the groups of men who are wanting to participate (regardless of age), but cannot do so because of a lack of gender parity.
  
  First, I'd be wrong to not address the elephant in the room in that a great number of people on this site are not true nudists but instead frequent this site as something sexual, and that an inordinate percentage of those people are men. I think it bears calling this out because it also happens to infiltrate non-landed and landed groups as well as beaches and so I do get the general wariness about single men - I try daily to make up for bad interactions made by many and can also state that there are many good men on here as well. Unfortunately the behavior by so many has been bad enough that women and couples have said "enough" and now I'm left trying to heal the rift as well as just trying to be accepted.
  
  Now, with that said I think that looking at landed clubs and non-landed social groups isn't a good control group: as I pointed out with the groups in my area they have rules that enforce parity and as such the reason they have the same number or men to women is that they control it. This isn't unique and if you do some digging around you'll see that membership is usually managed in a way that included qualifying a person's gender as well as often using marital status as a qualifier). If you If you want to look at a better control group then look at any local beach - if we were to go to Haulover, Gunnison, or Baker Beach here in the US you'd see a much larger ratio of men to women, large enough that it's easily visible and and that us trying to qualify the percentage of men to women wouldn't be figuring out if it's 60/40 but more so in doing the math by single digits - say 95/05.
  
  I'd also ask you to look at you circle of friends objectively. I have two brothers (all of us 55+) and only 1 of us is married. My one brother is unmarried because no woman in her right mind would believe his is political and religious views, and I am not because after a horrible 15 year marriage I don't believe in revisiting a long-term relationship until I am well healed and that, brother is going to take a decade or two. In my neighborhood of 15 homes there are 5 men over 55 who are single homeowners, so 1 of every 3 homeowners in my little corner of the world are single, mature men, and there are at least 3-4 more single adult males in the neighborhood who would raise/skew the number single men in this segment.
  
  I'd also state that I was a nudist before my marriage although it was stifled during that time, so I didn't just one day say "hey, now that I'm older and single it's time to get freaky!" Maybe the large number of single, older men you see wanting to join in are the men who finally have the chance to do so? I know of many nudist couples who put social nudism on the back-burner until the day the last kid headed of to college...
  
  I wish we could look at the number of members here but I made the comment earlier that I don't think we can - because you and I know that the members on this site are not all acting as nudists. I can tell you if you look at Forums and Group activity there are many more men participating than women and possibly those percentages are more representative of the varying percentages of women who have adopted the lifestyle versus the number of men.
  
  All in all, I think the fact that landed and non-landed groups groups control their members based on gender (and/or marital status), that a significant percentage of couples are not wanting to contact with single males, and that you yourself say you continually see statements by single men that we're not accepted might indicate that there's not parity.
  
  Just to add (somewhat tongue in cheek but with a hint of truth :]) ) that a married man saying it's not an issue is like me saying there's nothing behind the claims of discrimination by of people of color, or that as a man that trans people aren't discriminated against because I've not discriminated against them.

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• KE

  

  Kevin

  Oct 18, 2019

  One last thing...

  StevieLorna, although the dialogue has been "passionate" between us, there's a lot of appreciation for you for your participation, the way you defend your position, and the way you've done so by never demeaning me or the others here, and that you've always queried those who disagree or don't understand your opinion to keep talking about it.

  Others here have thrown out some pretty unfair and insulting language but not you. People may not see eye to eye but if passionate discussions about valid topics can't transpire here then where can they?

  We might not ever become friends or ever be in agreement, but there's respect on my part...

  Kevin

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• KE

  

  Kevin

  Oct 24, 2019

  ... and I assume that somehow I've killed the thread.

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• ST

  

  StevieLorna

  Oct 24, 2019

  You didnt kill it mate, its just there is not much more to say.

  Wait a week, some other guy will start a new thread asking what colour cock ring is best.

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• SH

  

  ShavedNudist27

  Oct 25, 2019

  The only jewelry that I wear is a silver neckless and a heavy silver anklet.

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• JA

  

  Jay

  Oct 25, 2019

  Well after this rather looooong debate about of all things, "'Jewelry' at resorts and beaches" all sides have rendered their opinions & arguments.
  As nudists & for the common good of our cause, sometimes we just have to "agree to disagree'". And whatever happened to "to each his own"? As nudists/naturists we are one of the MOST misunderstood groups & often among the least tolerated. I would think that WE should be quickest to be understanding & tolerant of our fellow members.
  It seems that the greatest objection here is to genital jewelry: piercings, Cock Rings, etc. I happen to be one, perhaps in the minority, who has and appreciates both. And to add to the offense, I also have some rather attractive tattoos.
  I myself, have been discriminated against AND excluded from some nudist circles & venues because of my adornments. And I am a long time card-carrying member of the AANR! I am not saying this to whine or complain in any way but to add to the discourse. As genuine nudists, I thought we were of the "accept yourself as you are" & "we don't judge how you look" persuasion. However, unfortunately, that is NOT true for too many in our nudist community. Change is an inevitable & unavoidable part of life. If we don't change, we don't grow. If we don't grow, we die!
  There's nothing more I can add to this debate. It seems that Kevin & Lee have weighed in & given some of the soundest arguments. And I can't begin to match them! So in my humble opinion, that would make them the "Lords of the 'RINGS" in this debate!
  Jay

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• KE

  

  Kevin

  Oct 25, 2019

  FreeLee and stoneandy; thanks for the encouragement and carrying the message of inclusivity forward - nothing but respect and appreciation for the two of you!

  Jay, we're buds so I don't have to stroke your ego in public :])

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• OL

  

  Olly

  Oct 25, 2019

  From Funcouple in post 59: [quote]these are the kind of low lifes that we need to ban from all resorts and beaches[/quote]
  
  As one of those "low lifes" I'm accepted on any nude beach or resort and many clubs. My chunky PA and nipple piercings may often start a conversation with a fellow nudist. So, lets add some fun to our nudist lifestyle, not hidebound by too many rules.

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• SI

  

  silversurfer

  Oct 25, 2019

  [quote]The older I get, the lower my scrotum hangs not sure why the hell I'd want to purposely stretch my scrotum. I gotta be careful not to sit on them nowadays! :DDDDDDD Ouch!!! LMSO[/quote] Yeah. I don't get that either.

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• FR

  

  FredBaresoul

  Oct 26, 2019

  I see there may be two aspects involved. One is about accepting others as they are. The other aspect is about choosing a thing, as piercing, for oneself. I myself see this and will accept others as they are. I still don't choose any of the things that alter my natural body. That does not change how I accept others, if they do not harm others or are a threat to others.

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• FU

  

  FullSun

  Oct 26, 2019

  [quote]I see there may be two aspects involved. One is about accepting others as they are. The other aspect is about choosing a thing, as piercing, for oneself. I myself see this and will accept others as they are. I still don't choose any of the things that alter my natural body. That does not change how I accept others, if they do not harm others or are a threat to others.[/quote] Well said. To each their own. I personally do not get it and have no desire for such things and my wife thinks they look silly. But just because we dont get or dont want such things does not mean someone else wouldnt or shouldnt have different ideas about it and it doesnt mean we cant accept each other or even become friends.

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• ST

  

  StevieLorna

  Oct 27, 2019

  While I agree you cant judge a book by its cover, the cover is very important. It gives you an idea of what the book is about.

  Its the same with people , you cant judge them until you know them, but you get an idea of what they are like by how they present themselves.

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• MA

  

  ManOfWicklow

  Oct 27, 2019

  [quote]While I agree you cant judge a book by its cover, the cover is very important. It gives you an idea of what the book is about. Its the same with people , you cant judge them until you know them, but you get an idea of what they are like by how they present themselves.[/quote] Excellent reply from StevieLorna. I totally agree.

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• T=

  

  Tom === Thomas S. Tierney

  Oct 27, 2019

  [quote]While I agree you cant judge a book by its cover, the cover is very important. It gives you an idea of what the book is about. Its the same with people , you cant judge them until you know them, but you get an idea of what they are like by how they present themselves.[/quote][LIKE]

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• MA

  mako09

  Nov 20, 2019

  Ok, I will break the mold in that YES I am pierced along with my wife, and I know many have stated that they don't agree with this type of attraction to genitals. Most of the people that I know that have genital piercings do it FOR others to see.

  My piercer when we were getting our piercings commented that having an intimate piercing gathers a lot of attention and that unless you don't mind people asking questions about it, he would suggest not getting one, which we both said we like conversation openers and were perfectly fine with others asking about our piercings.

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• SH

  

  ShavedNudist27

  Nov 20, 2019

  I were a silver neckless and a heavy silver anklet. I like how it looks!

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• KE

  

  Kevin

  Nov 20, 2019

  [quote]While I agree you cant judge a book by its cover, the cover is very important. It gives you an idea of what the book is about. Its the same with people , you cant judge them until you know them, but you get an idea of what they are like by how they present themselves.[/quote] I always crack the book and read a few pages...

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• ER

  

  Eric

  Jan 9, 2020

  What is a true nudist and who are we to determine that one persons level of nudity is or is not meeting the supposed definition?
  In Canada women have fought to go topless, we have fought to have nude beaches or clubs. Dont we have enough people picking our asses over nudity? Why must we get on our holier than thou high horse and bash people that dont meet our narrow and at times ignorant ideals?
  So I have a hole in my dick, if you dont like it dont look. I promise that if I dislike something that is what I will do.

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